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Infinity

SamClemmons

eloquent absurdity
Joined
Dec 6, 2001
Messages
2,920
Stalker! I don't know how many times I have to say this but here it is one more time before I get a restraining order. Brian, I was happilly married till you started this nonsense... well sorta, I love my wife but she doesn't like me very much. She bought me a Sony PRS-505 in an effort to curb interaction between us and ecourages my cigar habit, thinking, and rightly so, that I shut up in a general sort of way when I'm smoking one. But I digress, your gifts (sweet and simple ones at first) have grown in complexity to the point of emasculation. My wife thinks I'm out spending money and won't believe that I'm a victim of a stalker. The first words out of her mouth are "now what did you buy?", her next words are "here, have a cigar (plugs one into my gop) let me light that for you, where's your book? Why don't you go read?" To which I respond, "Hi". Anyway, STOP IT.
Thanks.
Have a cigar.
Where's your book?
Why don't you go read.

NA
 
Must be like your football bets Brian - You just don't know when to stop sending sticks. :sign: :D Nice Play.
 
LMAO...honestly, it's worth the the laugh.

Brian
 
Brian is generous to a fault and one of the BOTL here I hope to herf with someday.

Come on Brian you know you want to take the family on a European vacation next! :thumbs:

Enjoy the sticks Neal!
 
You think you got problems. I live with an old bat nurse, who doesn't believe any cockamamie stories about a generous person, who shares a name with a test for syphilis. I suspect there won't be any nursing going on around here for some time.

Doc.
 
I needed a laugh today. Neal, you should start writing political satire. Brian, well done!
 
You think you got problems. I live with an old bat nurse, who doesn't believe any cockamamie stories about a generous person, who shares a name with a test for syphilis. I suspect there won't be any nursing going on around here for some time.

Doc.
Oh puhlease. My wife cooks dinner for me every night and breakfast on the weekends. "Oh my" you say, "what a lucky guy" you continue. "It ain't like that" say I. It's insidious I tell you. She is a world class bad cook and I mean the absolute worst. See? She does it just to dare me to say something about it or, God forbid, not eat it. I'm over there fangin' down the most atrocious and revolting fare ever to be ruined on the stove and she's watching with that venomous little sneer on her face, poised and coiled and mentally working out her 2 hour speach about how ungrateful I am mostly to ruin and use up my cigar and reading time. Aaaand she's like, ubber successful and obscenely compensated and she only did THAT to rub my nose in it. So don't come to me with your silly "old bat nurse" schtick. Hah! Did I mention she's hot too? That's right, and won't give me no action neither. Don't bother people that have real problems Doc.

NA
 
You think you got problems. I live with an old bat nurse, who doesn't believe any cockamamie stories about a generous person, who shares a name with a test for syphilis. I suspect there won't be any nursing going on around here for some time.

Doc.
Oh puhlease. My wife cooks dinner for me every night and breakfast on the weekends. "Oh my" you say, "what a lucky guy" you continue. "It ain't like that" say I. It's insidious I tell you. She is a world class bad cook and I mean the absolute worst. See? She does it just to dare me to say something about it or, God forbid, not eat it. I'm over there fangin' down the most atrocious and revolting fare ever to be ruined on the stove and she's watching with that venomous little sneer on her face, poised and coiled and mentally working out her 2 hour speach about how ungrateful I am mostly to ruin and use up my cigar and reading time. Aaaand she's like, ubber successful and obscenely compensated and she only did THAT to rub my nose in it. So don't come to me with your silly "old bat nurse" schtick. Hah! Did I mention she's hot too? That's right, and won't give me no action neither. Don't bother people that have real problems Doc.

NA
Cry me a river! My wife makes a living torturing men; shoving glass tubes up their cranks. She bakes real well, though.

Doc.
 
Hey!! This is some good chit.

When was the last time we had this much fun watching two old coots try to "one up" each other??

Brian....the bomber with bene's.

LMAO!!

:laugh:
 
Wow, I'm not special at all :(
Brian laid down a world of hurt all over the place today.
 
You can all be thankful that Brian doesn't sing 'cause he'd have to do opera.





He's just that classy.
 
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