Friends...

Ok... got a question for y'all. As some may remember, my best bud is in Iraq for a year. so, I thought I'd do what best buds do... I sent him off a goodie box full of great cigars, t-shirts, a game, other assorted goodies and some goofy pics of the gang doing what we do best- screwing off. So I get an email this morning, and I was kinda suprised by this paragraph-

The boys and girl here love you, brother (see attached photo … note chick holding up humidor bag … AF major). We had a second farewell yesterday, so I finally took the chance and opened the salmon (which we ate with Wheat-Thins … improvise, improvise, improvise) and trotted out the last of the cigars last night. One thing really struck me hard last night. The new Aussie lieutenant colonel remarked that yesterday seemed “bloody well like Christmas … it’s hot as hell, I had a belly full of smoked salmon, and now I’m having a stogie with my mates!” To this one of the guys, a Navy lieutenant, looked at me really weird and asked, “So who’s this guy who sent you all this stuff?” So I told him again, just like I told the crowd at the last cigar night. And he replied, “No, really, why is this guy sending you all this stuff?” He was serious … and he wasn’t the only one. This started a whole conversation about friends and I was shocked at how divided the two camps were. To us, this was a completely normal thing (thought the beer cemented into a box threw that argument into a tail spin). To them, I must have something on you or can influence your career in some way so you’re sucking up to me, or we’re patently gay. Some of the Marines on our side were getting pretty pissed over the whole exchange, but all I could do was sit there and feel sorry for these lost souls. Thank you. Enuf with the serious shit … I’m getting misty!! (he sent some great pics BTW!!)

so here's my question- is this normal for people to assume some 'ulterior motive' for the box? he has nothing on me (quite the reverse actually!!), he can do nothing for my career, and the last time I checked we're not patently gay ??? As far as I'm concerned, what I did, and sent, was perfectly normal for things that friends do. Hell, we've always done crap like this, since he's been re-assigned out of state. Actually, this box was pretty tame! (A few here at CP have been witness to my 'beer in a foam box' trick!) But that makes me think the next one will be an earth shaker! :laugh:

So... is it normal to send stuff off to your fishing, hunting, try to piss your wife off best friend, or is it kinda weird? Here at CP we're always bombing people we don't know- would 'outsiders' call us all suckups or patently gay?

comments? discussion? but no links to the patently gay websites please... :laugh:

Maybe some of the said individuals do not have real "friends" like some others do, and dont know, and or respect the idea! That is a pretty sad fact in life. The best thing a person could get, speaking from my personal experience on deployments, is a box of great things from a buddy!! :thumbs:

Really really sad that they do not understand. Without a doubt in my mind, they are totally missing out on friendship!

just my $0.02 of course!

And what the hell is patently gay?? If sending a package to a friend makes you patently gay, then I must be flaming!! :0

This seems completely normal to me and I too find it hard to understand why those guys would find it odd. I don't have a lot of RL friends who would do this kind of thing for me but I totally get why it is done. I went on my honeymoon and we bought shirts for friends back here who we knew would never go themselves. To me it's just the type of thing friends do. Your buddy goes out of town and asks you to dogsit you just do it, your pal is in the hospital you visit and buy him a lapdance when he gets out.

I think it is those other guys that must have a problem with thier manhood. :laugh:

Wow!!! I'm rather shocked at that response, Jim...

As long as I can remember, I've always been involved in a "community". When I was a child my grandmother used to take me to the dinners, outings, "get-togethers", whatever - and it was about ALL of the attendees making sure everyone was a part of the "community" and had a great time - great food - great drink - great song - great dance - great laughter...

As I got older (high school age and into my 20's), I hung out with friends who wanted to make sure everyone was a part of the "community" of friends and had a great time - great food - great drink - great song - great dance - great laughter...

My parents bought an old farm in northern Wisconsin so we had a place to get away to. I was a "flat-lander" (they don't much care for Illinois residents up there), but they still accepted me (and my family) into their "community". We had a great time - great food - great drink - great song - great dance - great laughter...

I could go on and one...

During my life, though, there is no doubt that all of those people I knew would do exactly what you did for your friend. Geez - it would really suck if they didn't... I really don't know very many of those that I've sent packages to over in Iraq and Afghanastan - but I want them to know the "community" does care about them. I just wish I could do more...

It really is hard for me to fathom that others don't feel the same way - as generous as everyone I've chosen to associate with has been.

Those guys that he was having a debate with might not have had any family there to wave goodbye when their plane took off. So of course they can't understand why a friend would do something like what you did for your buddy.

I think firemen are always playing with their hoses.

Swissy, your friend appreciated what you did which is what was intended in the first place. Some assholes feel that people only do things to get something back and I am trully sorry for them. Don't let that get to you.

One thing is for sure you made your friend very happy and that all that matters :thumbs:

It is interesting that a gift like this would cause a debate. I know that with all of my close friends we all have "the floating $20". At some point you are the guy to buy the beer/cigars, and eventualy someone hits you back. Little things like this, at least to me, is how friends act. I just think they are jealous.

The concept of "paying it forward" excapes some folks. Since when is it gay or sucking up to be a brother?

GAY! How in the hell does being a good friend make anyone GAY? if you ask me, these insecure macho men have issues. I've sent packages to the guys in the military and to the botls all over, and i'm proud to be a friend to all of them. my eight year old grandson goes around saying GAY all the time. Sounds as though these guys are a little immature. Nuff said!

I think what you're doing is completely admirable and a 100% damn good thing. I have a couple guys I know and one I don't know very well and I send them sticks - for no other reason than they're there roughing it and I'm just trying to make their days a bit easier on the side. Keep doing it. Obviously your friend appreciates it his buddies enjoy it. The fact that they question it is a mark on them, not you or your buddy.

Hay you did a great thing don't even think about it. These people are in a war zone. I can understand that type of thinking its stress related I'm not excusing this but I do understand. I've been in this type situation myself and any little opening will be exploited. It's half being jealous that they don't have a friend like you and the other half is fear of not knowing how to be in this type of friendship. You don't have to question yourself your a good friend keep your head up. :thumbs:


WAR IS HELL

I think the overall theme of the other's responses can be described with one word...jealousy.

Jealous that they don't have friends like yourself probably, so they make excuses why he got the package other than, just because you're a good buddy.

I wouldn't worry about it. Hell of thing you've done here.

I agree that jealousy will get the best of you. Not being able to trust anybody reduces the chances of any friendship. There are people in this world that do not merely do things with an agenda. $0.02

You just have to wonder what these folks think about those of us who have sent care packages to those we've never even met and in some cases don't know at all. We've come to know Wyatt, Tazz H&T, and those who serve with them, so its easy to send what we can to help them enjoy as much as they can and to experience a little piece of home. However, how many of us have bombed anonymously knowing that the recipeint will never know who we are? Christmas indeed. I feel sorry for those who can't grasp the concept.

I guess that it's maybe a cultural thing. But I really don't see why other culture's definitions of friendship are so much different than ours. Especially in the military.... I send care packages often to my friends that are serving. Definitely NOT gay in any respects....
But, good for you. Way to be a great friend

If something like what we do makes us "gay", then I guess we make San Francisco look as straight as an arrow. What is done here is a network of friendships. I guess that man was never taught the idea of sharing. Swissy PM me the addy of your buddy so that I can send him a "gay" package to keep the ragmop talking.

ffopusxff said:

If something like what we do makes us "gay", then I guess we make San Francisco look as straight as an arrow. What is done here is a network of friendships. I guess that man was never taught the idea of sharing. Swissy PM me the addy of your buddy so that I can send him a "gay" package to keep the ragmop talking.

Click to expand...

That's what I am talking about! LOL :laugh: :laugh:

ffopusxff said:

Swissy PM me the addy of your buddy so that I can send him a "gay" package to keep the ragmop talking.

Click to expand...

WooHoo! Brokeback Cigar Pass!

Where's that photo of Bill? :laugh: