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Fauxhiba Pane-tell-alls

rectifythis

CP; may cause dependency
Joined
Oct 24, 2006
Messages
1,082
What the heck. Why not. This is purely for entertainment.

So a couple of guys at my work had to make a business trip to Mexico. They’re both occasional [and uninformed] cigar smokers. They both love the “Cohiba Panetelas.” But I know they have never had the genuine article. They know I am a cigar smoker and offered me a couple from their boxes they smuggled back. I knew as soon as the box emerged from his backpack that they were fake.

Fuaxhiba8.jpg

Fuaxhiba9.jpg


Some reasons they are fake:
1. Glass top
2. They don’t smell right
3. They are horribly under filled
4. Duty sticker was faked
5. Bad cap [not a triple]
6. Bad roll [and it feels like short filler]
7. Ugly, discolored wrapper
8. Wrong color of gold
9. Wrong font
10. Not embossed
11. Dots wrong/band image quality
12. ‘C’ was under the label
13. Wrong color yellow
14. Text says La Habana, not Habana
15. Wrong length/size
16. It came from Mexico (not LCDH)
17. They only paid $20 for the whole box!
18. I’m sure we could go on


Actual size: 30ish ring x 4.85
Fuaxhiba.jpg

Fuaxhiba3.jpg
Fuaxhiba5.jpg
Fuaxhiba6.jpg



Thing is, it doesn’t actually smell all that putrid. It just smells cheap. Initial impressions of low quality tobacco and wet straw. Pre-light draw confirms this and has me worried I will be scouring my tongue later with Scotch-brite.


The light was worse than I had anticipated. There was no depth of flavor whatsoever. It tasted more like a high quality cigarette as opposed to a low quality cigar. As I type this, I am emanating the scent of cigarette; not cigar.


Fauxhiba10.jpg

This is the only picture I could capture of the ash as it fell off before I could even get the first shot of it.

So I decided at one inch since I could take no more, I ought to do a CSI on the bastid. A quick unraveling revealed 100% short filler which looked like mulch.
Fauxhibafiller.jpg



Final thoughts: Why? Just why? Please pass the Scotch-brite.
 
Bravo!

A worthy effort indeed. I don't think I'd have the balls to smoke such a gnarly looking fake. :D

Well done, Mike. Well done.

Wilkey
 
Wow! I personally don't have the balls to smoke one of those, God only knows whats in it.

I don't think I've seen a fake that is as obvious as that one though.
 
These posts are the reason why I love CP. BOTLs putting their taste buds in danger, providing a realistic experience, as well as a myriad of reasons as to why the cigar in question is FAKE. You didn't just post, "It's fake, and I know it." You actually gave reasoning and education for other BOTLs to experience.


Well done to you sir, and thank you again for your dangerous work!!! :thumbs:
 
These posts are the reason why I love CP. BOTLs putting their taste buds in danger, providing a realistic experience, as well as a myriad of reasons as to why the cigar in question is FAKE. You didn't just post, "It's fake, and I know it." You actually gave reasoning and education for other BOTLs to experience.


Well done to you sir, and thank you again for your dangerous work!!! :thumbs:
Sort of like a cop, field testing white powder.

Doc.
 
These posts are the reason why I love CP. BOTLs putting their taste buds in danger, providing a realistic experience, as well as a myriad of reasons as to why the cigar in question is FAKE. You didn't just post, "It's fake, and I know it." You actually gave reasoning and education for other BOTLs to experience.


Well done to you sir, and thank you again for your dangerous work!!! :thumbs:
Sort of like a cop, field testing white powder.

Doc.


:laugh: Doc makes me laugh at least once a day. Nice review!
 
These posts are the reason why I love CP. BOTLs putting their taste buds in danger, providing a realistic experience, as well as a myriad of reasons as to why the cigar in question is FAKE. You didn't just post, "It's fake, and I know it." You actually gave reasoning and education for other BOTLs to experience.


Well done to you sir, and thank you again for your dangerous work!!! :thumbs:
Sort of like a cop, field testing white powder.

Doc.


:laugh: Doc makes me laugh at least once a day. Nice review!

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: Hilarious Doc!! :thumbs:
 
I dunno,,,,,I heard the ohiba glass tops are pretty rare!!!

:sign: :sign: :sign:
 
I think you win the prize for the worst fakes, ever.

Nice analysis, and brave of you to "take one for the team"..... :laugh:

Regards - B.B.S.
 
Your crazy.

What if there was some bug rolled inside?
or made out of Banana leaves? :sign:

Did you inform your co-workers?

Good job on the review.
But really, that is the worst fake I have ever seen.
 
I did inform my co-workers that they were absolutely fake, and while they were bummed, they had already smoked ALL of them by the time I did this review. Poor bastids.
 
I did inform my co-workers that they were absolutely fake, and while they were bummed, they had already smoked ALL of them by the time I did this review. Poor bastids.

As others have stated in the thread these are the worst fakes I have ever seen. The fact your co-workers are still alive after smoking these things is amazing, and they are extremely brave. :laugh: :thumbs:
 
Wow, I've seen fake CCs in the Middle East between pirated DVDs and fake perfumes that look better than these. A brave review indeed. :D

Barry

Edited for terrible punctuation.
 
It's because of threads like this that I will never have to worry about buying fakes. I know have basically knowledge that will help me find the real deals.

Great thread man!
 
Cool post bro. I laughed my ass off.
You Sir, are the King of reviewers IMHO :laugh:
 
These posts are the reason why I love CP. BOTLs putting their taste buds in danger, providing a realistic experience, as well as a myriad of reasons as to why the cigar in question is FAKE. You didn't just post, "It's fake, and I know it." You actually gave reasoning and education for other BOTLs to experience.


Well done to you sir, and thank you again for your dangerous work!!! :thumbs:
Sort of like a cop, field testing white powder.

Doc.


:laugh: Doc makes me laugh at least once a day. Nice review!

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: Hilarious Doc!! :thumbs:

:laugh: that one got me too Doc :laugh:
 
These posts are the reason why I love CP. BOTLs putting their taste buds in danger, providing a realistic experience, as well as a myriad of reasons as to why the cigar in question is FAKE. You didn't just post, "It's fake, and I know it." You actually gave reasoning and education for other BOTLs to experience.


Well done to you sir, and thank you again for your dangerous work!!! :thumbs:
Sort of like a cop, field testing white powder.

Doc.

I never tried that,lol.
 
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