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So friggin angry. Don't know what to do?

So basically the courts are saying it costs $41,000 a year to raise your two kids. Because, the way they look at it is child-support is based evenly considering the proportions of what each parent makes monthly. You're saying the proportions are 50-50?

Something does not sound right......

Who pays for their health insurance? Who pays for any daycare expenses for an afterschool care etc.?

Vision/Dental?
 
Talk to a lawyer.
 
State laws differ as well. You may want to find out what the laws are in Texas, should you decide to take her up on things.
 
From what I understand secondhand, the fathers tend to have a level playing field in Texas.
 
I am not qualified to give you good advice. All I can tell you is that you are not alone and many of us deal(t) with this issue.
 
All that I can add is that I have been going through something similar for ten years now and had I acted out of anger or aggression, things would most likely be worse than they are now.
 
Make sure that you are smart and deliberate in your actions and best of luck to you.
 
Well this is friggin weird. The company I work for in Mass has an open position in Dallas . Same job I'm doing now. How weird is that. I'm going to look into it further. Dallas is where my ex wants to move to. Hummmm.

But my current woman say no way she will move down there.
 
Lagamm said:
Well this is friggin weird. The company I work for in Mass has an open position in Dallas . Same job I'm doing now. How weird is that. I'm going to look into it further. Dallas is where my ex wants to move to. Hummmm.But my current woman say no way she will move down there.
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Some times things fall into place!

As for your lady friend, what's stopping her? I personally love a woman with a southern accent.... Lol
 
Don't back down. Remember that child support is a separate discussion from parenting time so if you were to see them less you could still wind up paying the same amount of child support. Relocation is a hot topic in all states as far as custody goes... Make sure your lawyer can speak about that issue with a deep knowledge of the factors to be considered. Mom getting married to someone out of state is only a small factor in a much larger analysis.

Good luck.
 
I don't know what the housing market is in MA, but in TX I know it's good, at least from what I've seen.  Good luck, and yeah I'd run everything by a lawyer first before doing anything.
 
jfields said:
From what I understand secondhand, the fathers tend to have a level playing field in Texas.
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Hah! I got boned on my child support order. I was even the one that filed to pay it so that she didn't come back later and try and lie saying I never payed her privately. In the consultation they asked her if she wanted back child support to when the baby was born (even though she lived under my roof and I paid for all the lodging expenses). Child support in Texas is 20% of post tax income for child #1 and it goes up 5% per child afterwards....stopping at 50% (i think).
 
I didn't even have a chance. She even had the choice to give me supervised visitation until the child was 3 by a state worker...I'm squeaky clean, worked for the Boy Scouts at the time, and did nothing but provide for them. No level playing field here.
 
....As far as the problem at hand, if it were me, I'd do whatever I can to fight for those children to stay. You want to be a part of their lives....and when they are 15 or old enough to understand, you have all of the court records and evidence that you fought your hardest to keep them around. Eventually, they will understand. Just what I would do....fwiw.
 
The Black Cloud said:
I don't know what the housing market is in MA, but in TX I know it's good, at least from what I've seen.  Good luck, and yeah I'd run everything by a lawyer first before doing anything.
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The housing market in Mass is ridiculous. So expensive to live in this state. I can't even come close to a decent house near where I work for less than $400k . So I drive 60miles each way to work. Sucks. I wouldn't mind moving to a state with a better housing market.

Also, as for child support. Looks like the guidelines have changed since I got divorced. I should be paying $300-400 a month less than I currently do. I'm going to file a change asap. I'm sure this will make my ex really happy.
 
Lagamm said:
 
I don't know what the housing market is in MA, but in TX I know it's good, at least from what I've seen.  Good luck, and yeah I'd run everything by a lawyer first before doing anything.
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The housing market in Mass is ridiculous. So expensive to live in this state. I can't even come close to a decent house near where I work for less than $400k . So I drive 60miles each way to work. Sucks. I wouldn't mind moving to a state with a better housing market.

Also, as for child support. Looks like the guidelines have changed since I got divorced. I should be paying $300-400 a month less than I currently do. I'm going to file a change asap. I'm sure this will make my ex really happy.
 
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Did you do the worksheet calculator? http://www.mass.gov/courts/docs/forms/probate-and-family/cjd304-worksheet-child-support-guidelines.pdf
 
Remember, before you go to court, there is a "finding period" where each of you can legally request bank/credit statements, child care payments, insurance, mortgage statements, tax returns, monthly income.That way she can't just say "I'm paying $500.00 a month for Daycare". It works both ways though.  ;)
 
Quick update on what's been happening. My company has their largest facility in Fort Worth.Tx They just so happened to have a great engineering position open that they are interested in me for. I got the OK from HR and my boss to pursue this position (I was required to tell them). Passed the 1st set of phone interviews and should have the 2Nd set this week. Then an on sight interview.

So there is a very good possibility that this will work out positive for everyone.
Oh and my ex got married yesterday. Not sure how I feel about that. Mostly Indifferent with a tinge of nostalgia.
 
The EX wife will be a part of your life forever.  You need to get over the anger and try to find a way to get along, at least as far as your children can see.  You'll feel better too.
 
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