OpusXKC
MOΛΩN ΛABE
- Joined
- Nov 20, 2005
- Messages
- 987
Have you heard the word? JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSE is loose!
Joose (pronounced juice) is a malt liquor energy drink beverage that is absolutely ridiculous. First the idea that in a single can you can have an upper and a downer is amazing. Enough ginsing, guarana, deer penis or wtf ever they put in energy drinks, along with the high quality 9.9% abv you expect from your favorite Schlitz or King Cobra, is like getting jacked off by a grizzly bear. A generous experience, but you're still frightened of where it is going.
Now if the general premise of this product isn't enough to make you question why you want to try it, the flavor selection will. Right now the JOOSE (screamed not spoken), comes in an array of flavors. The following I have tried.
I can honestly say that I had not known what the meaning of the popular street term "krunked" was, but after my experiences here I now most certainly do.
--Pic of the demon seed for reference--
PS -- FOUR Loko, as pictured above, is also a MLED (malt liquor energy drink)....not tasty, but 12% abv :whistling:
Joose (pronounced juice) is a malt liquor energy drink beverage that is absolutely ridiculous. First the idea that in a single can you can have an upper and a downer is amazing. Enough ginsing, guarana, deer penis or wtf ever they put in energy drinks, along with the high quality 9.9% abv you expect from your favorite Schlitz or King Cobra, is like getting jacked off by a grizzly bear. A generous experience, but you're still frightened of where it is going.
Now if the general premise of this product isn't enough to make you question why you want to try it, the flavor selection will. Right now the JOOSE (screamed not spoken), comes in an array of flavors. The following I have tried.
- Red -- A cranberry flavored product with only a meager 9.0% abv...pffffttt why bother
- Orange -- A tasty clone of the popular Mountain Dew Livewire drink now with 9.9% abv. Gather your WoW and D&D buddies for a drunken night of Rush albums and Cheetos, because I just got a +4 to Kick Ass !
- Dragon -- A powerful dark ninja beverage that is permeated with the best flavors of Welch's Grape Soda and evil. This stuff smells like the Grimace, and as you know nothing can kill the Grimace. This stuff gets the job done. Drink two and call me to get you out of jail in the morning.
- Jungle -- Nuclear green Shrek piss with a stank like the Swamp Thing's nuts, it slaps your tongue like a whore that hasn't been paid. Mountain Dew grew up, went to LA and started doing speed balls for a few years, and well...here is the result. I still have no idea why I drank this, but I need my fix man.
- Mamba -- OH MY! The KoolAid man and that retarded kid from the Hawaiian Punch can have concocted a deadly brew here! This is as charismatic and dangerous as Ted Bundy. Once you let it in you are defiantly screwed.
I can honestly say that I had not known what the meaning of the popular street term "krunked" was, but after my experiences here I now most certainly do.
--Pic of the demon seed for reference--
PS -- FOUR Loko, as pictured above, is also a MLED (malt liquor energy drink)....not tasty, but 12% abv :whistling: