"To fully appreciate fine cigars, it's important to recognize the various types of cigars. There are two basic categories of cigar. The lit and unlit."
-- P. Martin Shoemaker, Jeff MacNelly, From the comic strip "Shoe"
"A schmoke und a pancake. You know, a flapjack und a shigarette? No? Shigar und a waffle? No? Pipe und a crepe? No? Bong und a blintz? No? Well, then there ish no pleashing you."
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