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"Monster" of a contest

lurch

lurch

I.Y.A.O.Y.A.S.
Joined
Jul 1, 2007
Messages
1,853
Buwawaha....

gallery_5704_381_4906.jpg


Halloween is upon us kiddies and the time has come for this "Monster" of a contest.

Give me your funniest mishap/ occurance during Halloween that is Halloween related and you'll get a goulish good prize.

One post/story per person. Contest ends when I leave work which should be around 1400 tomorrow (Nov 1). Must be an active member with at least one month and 40 posts....

Happy Haunting



edit to change the time
 
The Halloween, I fell in love with the bartender. Here is the story.

Costume of the evening Pee Wee Hermen. Drink of choice Incredible Hulk.
So me and my friends were having a good time at a college bar, $100 all you can drink from 11-2. Some may view this as a bad deal I viewed it as a challenge. After the countless Incredible Hulks and shots, I am now the guy who can hook up with the bartender .
She was a sluty devil, the best kind of devil. I talked my best game. Last call came around I’m still trying my hardest . During all this I won some sort of contest . My friends are trying to get me out of the bar, But I decide I’m going to stay with the sluty vampire, I mean devil, or zombie, lets say girl. Being very drunk and very persuasive they let me stay. I cleaned the bar literally.
The lights are off the gates are closing, and I’m trying to get the girl in the sack . Now this is a direct Quote “ I’m a bartender I’m not interested in you “. Ok its not a direct quote but what was said was a blur, and way to hurtful to remember . But what happened next was the real story.
I now realize that I have no money for a cab and no way to get home. So I’m standing with a group of people having a smoke. The last bartenders roll out and all of a sudden I here “Pee Wee”. It seems that the bartender that I was hitting on in the beginning of the night was not the same as the one I was hitting on at the end of the night . Who knew. The sluty devil remembered me. This was the conversation as I remember it.
“What are you still doing here” “I wanted to say goodnight to you and maybe get your number “.
“Are you waiting for a cab” “ no I kind of wonder what to do, I don’t have a way home”. “hey I live right up stair’s want to crash at my place” “ABSOLUTLEY”
The next morning I made the sluty devil an omelet and a pot of coffee wit a note.
{Had to get to work, enjoy the breakfast , PeeWee }
I still have the problem of how to get home. Well what I won was a bottle of vodka. So I had to get on a train . I found a bum and sold him the bottle of vodka for all his change in his cup . Surprisingly had enough left over for a cup of Joe at DD.

That is my best Halloween story that I will tell.
 
When my brother an I were kids (maybe 8 and 12 years old) we had a Halloween Party. It was held in our garage and back yard. We had all kinds of food like pizza, doughnuts, cupcakes, hot dogs etc. While in the backyard, and at a time where there was no parental supervision, someone thought it would be funny to toss some food over the fence into the neighbor's backyard. Now this does not sound liek that big of a problem unless you were aware that the neighbor had a nice pool in the yard. Of course we knew this and the whole point was to see if you could get what ever it was you tossed into the pool. This new party game occurred a few, no more than a few times ... well it happened alot. In fact my mother made a comment that she was suprised we ate almost all fo the food and the paper plates were all cleaned off. :whistling:

Well the next morning I just had to look .... OH MY GOD! The pool looked like 20,000 gallons of vomit! A regular stew of pizza, doughnuts, cupcakes, hot dogs etc.

Needless to say my brother an I had to go next door, much to our embarrassment, not to mention my mother's, and clean the pool. We spent a couple hours cleaning the pool and the rest of the day in our rooms. :(
 
So one Halloween in college, I dressed up as hulk Hogan- down to growing out the mustache for 6 weeks. I had yellow sweatpants, black boots, a red do-rag, the mustache and had 3 yellow tank tops with Hulkamania stenciled with red ink on the front. I took scissors and cut a little bit of the yellow tanktops at the neck to make them easier to rip off. I was totally Hulked out, I had been watching some old WWF matches to get the leg drop, the posses and the "Cannot hear you" arm to the ear thing. Anyway, I'm at a party at school, and my friend calls me to help direct her to the party, as there are a ton of parties in the area. I go out to the street to find her and ended up in the intersection directing traffic (mostly drunk students walking from party to party) with Hulkamania jesters. Well, one of the few cars that I tried to direct through the intersection was a cop car. The stopped me and politely watched as I tore off my Hulkimania shirt and yelling "Oh Yeah, Brother" 20 times before writing me a drinking in public ticket. The nice thing was that I didn't have my ID with me, so I gave them my alias. I went back to the party, with a new Hulkamania shirt on and continued my impersonation of the Hulkster which honestly would have made him proud!
 
Here is the story, as best as I can remember it:

So there I was in a bar with Little Bo Peep, Captain Morgan, and the priest.......

Last year, on the weekend of Halloween, my college roommate got married in Omaha. On Friday night after the rehersal, and dinner, the wedding party and a few friends headed over to a bar named Farrell's. In this bar there is a private room for parties, but it has a glass front so you can see everything that is going on inside the bar. So there are about 20 of us in this private room, including the bride and groom and the Father "Greg"(I don't want to get him in trouble so lets call him Greg), who was presiding over the wedding. Everyone is drinking, telling stories, and just having a grand old time, when one of the guys stops the action by saying "Holy crap, look at Little Bo Peep." Needless to say we all stared out the front of the room at one of the must stunning girls we've ever seen wearing a Bo Peep outfit. After a few minutes of staring and drooling, things returned to normal.

A little later in the evening a couple of the ladies with us head out to sing karaoke, and when they returned Father "Greg" says, loud enough for everyone to hear him, "Dang, I thought they were going out there to get Bo Peep's number for me." Having some liquid courage in us, we saw this as a challenge. After a few minutes of persuasion, and buying a round of drinks for Bo and her friends, they did in fact end up in the room with us, and Bo Peep walked right over and sat on Father "Greg's" lap. He was stunned and giddy at the same time.
bopeep.jpg


So the night continues, when suddenly in to the bar walks none other than Captain Morgan and the Morganettes. These were not just people in halloween costumes, but the real reps from Capt. Morgan. It didn't take long for us to convince the Captain and his crew to join us (I think Bo Peep contributed to our success), and the legend of the wedding was cemented.
thecaptain.jpg


So now, to this day, my friend's wedding is, and will forever be, known as the Little Bo Peep wedding, and every story about the wedding begins with the phrase:

So there I was in a bar with Little Bo Peep, Captain Morgan, and the priest.......
 
Sophmore year of highschool, I invited 15 of my closest friends over to our house. My mother and father were going to a Halloween party and the one rule was "don't go driving around tonight" (we lived in a very large, kid friendly neighborhood with many children were out trick-o-treating).

About 10 minutes after they left, we loaded up in two 4runners where the back window could be rolled down. Each car had paintball guns.

We drove around the neighborhood streets shooting paintballs at each other's cars. At one point someone threw firecrackers onto the hood of one of the cars. Eventually the two cars got split up in the neighborhood. The other car found a gaggle of freshmen in the neighborhood and proceeded to harass them with ducttape and paintballs.

We all reconvened in my driveway, by which point my parents were already home watching us. I got yelled at to come in the house immediately, they informed me to send everyone home. As I was sending folks away, a cute girl pulled up out front showing off her new car and driver's license seeing if I wanted to ride around block. Without hesitation I jumped in.

When I eventually came back home, I had to explain
1) Where I had gone: "To ride around the block with that girl..." Strike one
2) Why the guys were dumping out beers in our driveway: "Oh those weren't beers, they were paintball gun barrels..." Strike two
3) Why we went driving around the neighborhood: "Oh, I thought you meant not to drive outside the neighborhood."

1 month grounded...got an additionally two weeks when the neighborhood watch reported two cars driving around throwing firecrackers and tolietpapering houses in the neighborhood (I tried to explain that it was a coincidence that the TP appeared only on freshmen houses...)



...Crap...having typed out this story after many years of regression, and being a new father...I see how screwed I too will be.
 
Pompous Pugs said:
...Crap...having typed out this story after many years of regression, and being a new father...I see how screwed I too will be.
Click to expand...

I'm right there with you Pugs... I'm scared shitless of what's to come when my daughter gets to high school....

BTW...I'll be leaving within the hour so get those stories in soon
 
A few years back (not nearly enough though) myself and two friends grabbed some paintball guns and headed out to a lake in a nearby town to look for some trouble. There was a walking path that went around the lake, and lots of woods, and on a regular night, the place was full of kids. Halloween was certainly no different.

We were dressed from head to toe in black, black bags to carry extra rounds and air, and were ready to go. We walked along the path, fired a few random rounds into the woods, but nothing exciting. Then we saw a light coming around the corner further up the path. Looks like a couple kids were going to walk right into our path.

We got into position, two on the left side of the path so we had a better shot right as they turned the corner, the third on the right. Locked and loaded, ready to fire...the lights getting closer... now lights... two of them...real close...

OH $H!T! Police car. Like I said, this wasn't too long ago. We were way too old to be messing around in the woods like this. We scrambled off the path, but the woods weren't that thick there. Our only hope was to lay face down on the ground as still as possible. We threw the guns and bags down, and laid on top of them. Perfectly still. Hardly even breathing. Just laying there. No movement.

The car pulled up to right where we were. Started scanning the area with a search light. In reality, it was probably about 20-30 seconds they looked... but it felt like an hour of just lying there. Even after the light was turned off and we heard the car leave, we stayed there. Waiting. Just trying to create a little more space.

Well, we're dumb, but not stupid. We took that as our one warning. Walked back to the car, full of mud, and packed the stuff up to play another day.

Thanks for the contest!
 
These stories are amazing. Keep them coming. I wish I had something as entertaining to tell.

I'm not getting any work done today. LMAO!
 
Ok...I've gotta get going but I'm going to extend this until tomorrow at 1400....

(I just feel bad for those that can't get on at work so I'll work with them)
 
I was dressed as a 'flasher'.

3/4 trench coat, red Nike running shoes and a mask.

I stopped over my mom's for a 'tan girdle' and that was it..I was off and running - almost.

Before I finished, mom said..'wait a minute'. I did.

She came back with a single nylon stocking and a tan turtle neck. She tied the end of the stocking and turned it inside out - then stuffed the shirt in there(evenly) and lookie there - insta-peepee!!!

I tucked the open end into the girdle and closed the coat.

The girl I was with (she was in my old 2 piece with a mask/dress shows and white gloves), she and I went to a house party.

When we got there, nobody recognized us. We proceeded to walk around the house party for about 1/2 hour. Me skulking around and her just walking and stopping for a while...walking and stopping for a while!!!

Within that 1/2 hour they started the best costume prize. She walked out to the middle of the room for all to see...and got rave applause.
I walked out, did a look around and STOPPED....right in front of this chick sitting in a chair.....I looked at her, then around....then BOOM - opened my jacket and flopped this 3 foot peepee right on her lap!

The place went nuts....pictures in 'odd' positions all around!!!

Needless to say...since she and I came in together...we both won! ...and it was another 15 minutes before we took off the masks.

-------------------

Oh - and there's the time that my friends in the ambulance/firehouse heard over the radio:
'There's a white male, approx. 6ft tall, running west bound along the center line of Maple Street. He's wearing black pants, red shoes and no shirt. It looks like three males are in pursuit!"

But that's another story! :whistling:
 
Ok...

Sorry about the lack of punctuality on my part but we've been bust getting ready for the Texas- Texas Tech game... (Go TEXAS!!!)

Drumroll please....


fivebyfifty takes it with his "mistaken identity" story...

PM me your addy and I'll get it out to you Monday
 
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