A first-grade teacher was having trouble with one of her students. The
> teacher asked, "Harry, what is your problem?"
>
> Harry answered, "I'm too smart for the first-grade. My sister is in
the
> third-grade and I am smarter than she is! I think I should be in the
> third-grade too!"
>
> The teacher had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office.
While
> Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the
principal
> what the situation was. The principal told the teacher he would give
the
> boy a test and if he failed to answer any of his questions he was to
go
> back to the first-grade and behave. The teacher agreed. Harry was
brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the
test.
>
> Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"
>
> Harry: "9"
>
> Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"
>
> Harry: "36"
>
> And so it went with every question the principal thought a third-grade
> should know. The principal looks at the teacher and tells her, "I
think Harry can go to the third-grade." The teacher says to the principal,
"Let me ask him some questions?" The principal and Harry both agree.
>
> Teacher: "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?
>
> Harry: "Legs"
>
> Teacher: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?" (The
> principal wondered, why does she ask such a question!)
>
> Harry: "Pockets"
>
> Teacher: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?"
>
> Harry: "Pants"
>
> Teacher: "What's starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy,
> oval,delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?" (The principal's
eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer...)
>
> Harry: "Coconut"
>
> Teacher: "What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?"
>
> Harry: "Bubblegum"
>
> Teacher: "What does a man do standing up, a woman do sitting down and
a dog do on three legs?" (The principal's eyes open really wide and
before he could stop the answer...)
>
> Harry: "Shake hands"
>
> Teacher: "Now I will ask some 'Who am I' sort of questions, okay?"
>
> Harry: "Yup"
>
> Teacher: "You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me
up. I get wet before you do."
>
> Harry: "Tent"
>
> Teacher: "A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored.
The best man always has me first." (Principal was looking restless and bit tense)
>
> Harry: "Wedding Ring"
>
> Teacher: "I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you
blow me, you feel good."
>
> Harry: "Nose"
>
> Teacher: "I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a quiver."
>
> Harry: "Arrow"
>
> Teacher: "What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a
lot of excitement?"
>
> Harry: "Fire truck"
>
> The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put his
ass in the sixth-grade. I got the last ten questions wrong myself.
> teacher asked, "Harry, what is your problem?"
>
> Harry answered, "I'm too smart for the first-grade. My sister is in
the
> third-grade and I am smarter than she is! I think I should be in the
> third-grade too!"
>
> The teacher had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office.
While
> Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the
principal
> what the situation was. The principal told the teacher he would give
the
> boy a test and if he failed to answer any of his questions he was to
go
> back to the first-grade and behave. The teacher agreed. Harry was
brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the
test.
>
> Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"
>
> Harry: "9"
>
> Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"
>
> Harry: "36"
>
> And so it went with every question the principal thought a third-grade
> should know. The principal looks at the teacher and tells her, "I
think Harry can go to the third-grade." The teacher says to the principal,
"Let me ask him some questions?" The principal and Harry both agree.
>
> Teacher: "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?
>
> Harry: "Legs"
>
> Teacher: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?" (The
> principal wondered, why does she ask such a question!)
>
> Harry: "Pockets"
>
> Teacher: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?"
>
> Harry: "Pants"
>
> Teacher: "What's starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy,
> oval,delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?" (The principal's
eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer...)
>
> Harry: "Coconut"
>
> Teacher: "What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?"
>
> Harry: "Bubblegum"
>
> Teacher: "What does a man do standing up, a woman do sitting down and
a dog do on three legs?" (The principal's eyes open really wide and
before he could stop the answer...)
>
> Harry: "Shake hands"
>
> Teacher: "Now I will ask some 'Who am I' sort of questions, okay?"
>
> Harry: "Yup"
>
> Teacher: "You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me
up. I get wet before you do."
>
> Harry: "Tent"
>
> Teacher: "A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored.
The best man always has me first." (Principal was looking restless and bit tense)
>
> Harry: "Wedding Ring"
>
> Teacher: "I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you
blow me, you feel good."
>
> Harry: "Nose"
>
> Teacher: "I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a quiver."
>
> Harry: "Arrow"
>
> Teacher: "What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a
lot of excitement?"
>
> Harry: "Fire truck"
>
> The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put his
ass in the sixth-grade. I got the last ten questions wrong myself.
