• Hi Guest - Come check out all of the new CP Merch Shop! Now you can support CigarPass buy purchasing hats, apparel, and more...
    Click here to visit! here...

2 hour contest

grateful1

Oh My!
Joined
Feb 6, 2006
Messages
19,624
For a few sticks....



Tell us why Josh's <smokelaw1's> pc was broken.



The winning tale or comment will be the funniest one that is posted.

I will be the judge and I can change the rules.



This is a serious contest - but - make up your answer <it's encouraged>!!!



Contest end's 2 hour's from the original post time!
 
Simple, he got pissed and and kicked the living shit out of it...

LINK

Added link to the incident
 
“Do you think he will ever fully recover?”

“I am not sure, it is too early to tell. I am sorry. We will try our best to make him comfortable.”

Josh, could hear the words, but could not see who was speaking. One voice was his wife, the other was a stranger to his ears.

It was all a blur. The flash, the scream, then, nothing. Josh struggled to say something, but all he could mutter were a few short grunts.

“Easy honey! You have been through a lot.” He could feel the gentle touch of her hand on his forehead.

“Whaa….what happened?”

“You were an idiot, that is what!” Came the unfamiliar voice.

“Doctor! How can you say such a thing?” said his wife.

“Easy,” replied the doctor, “Any fool should know that you cannot surf the internet in a hot tub!”
 
Mold spores. They spread from his crappy early 80's Davidoffs. Combination of porn "reisdue" and drool from reading about booze, cigars and jazz in CT moistened the spores. They started growing in his Universal Cereal Bus. Nothing like mold to make a Cereal break fast.

:p
 
Simple, it was smart ass overload..

Josh: “Oooh...ooohhh..I'll take 'em. Seeingas you are such a well known member. Oh, and I TOTALLY trust you from all of your time in here and what you have done for the community. Also...oh, yeah, I'm sure you are like, totally well schooled at storage of cigars.
So yeah...there is also this thing we do here, and that is NOT being a stopping point for strangers looking to sell cigars.”

PC: “One smart ass comment too many, DOSE not compute, DOSE NOT COMPUTE. AHHHHHH….”

*Booom*
 
Gary,
This is awesome! I have had a crappy, crappy day...and this is just the sort of laughs I need. Thanks guys...
LOL @ Tigger.
 
Ok, I have some freakin haiku version:

Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I'm going to sleep,
and that's why smokelaws computer is broken


...oh crap ...shot me!
 
I don't know this guy at all but let me give it a try:

C-Bid + Enzyte= Busted Compter
 
Josh was looking at one of AVB's cigar girls and by mistake clicked
onto Moki's cigar girls. But, Josh thought the image in front
of him was the same, that his brain was seeing beauty as a beast.

Josh shook his head, the image remained. He butted his head on the
monitor but still, the image remained. He butted the monitor again
only this time the monitor shattered into pieces.

Disillusioned, Josh got up and went to the mirror, the image he expected
to see was not there. Instead, Moki's cigar girl looked back at him.
Josh freaked, "no, no, no" he screamed! He grabbed the PC tower and
with all his strength threw it into the mirror smashing the mirror
into a thousand pieces. At the same time, the PC tower exploded into
junk components.

The moral of the story - don't look at Moki's cigar girls, Moki and your
wives conceived the plot to destroy any thoughts of another woman.

Poor Josh had a crappy, crappy day! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

Brian
 
It had been a long week for P.C his user had to be the dreariest user ever. His buddy the IBM down the road had three teenagers as users 2 girls and a boy between them surfing my space and downloading the newest gangster rap the IBM was one happy computer. Could he be so lucky no he gets a user that smokes nasty cigars that gum up his processor and leave stains on his screen and if that weren’t bad enough he had to suffer through endless legal mumbo jumbo being entered into his memory. Oh what he wouldn’t give for one snoop dog tune to rattle his circuits a bit at least the Sony down the street got to run code his user was a 13 year old hacker. But no all his user wanted to do was type documents and surf some dreary forum about cigar smoking grr why couldn’t his user be one of those guys that go for the streamlined gaming machines with 3d accelerators and lots of sounds and colors.

Enough was enough the damn guy had dropped his last cigar ash on his keyboard and he was tired of scotch being dribbled on to his case it was time to act. He contacted his buddy Sony I have had it pal I can not take one more second of this CP forum he keeps making me log into it is so dull so send me you worse virus lets end it all. Sony said now P.C how bad can it be most forums at least has a chat and that can be entertaining. P.c says Sony all the chat in the world d can’t change my mind it is time I want to make sure he don’t make his next deadline. Sony beeps rather sadly and transmits his friend pc a special e-mail that says read me. P.C whirrs a bit as he reads his last note. One by one his leds flicker and die.



I think it commited suicide.
 
:0 There he sat looking hard to find a poor unsuspecting newbie to tear up for posting a question he could find by using the search feature when it hit him like an explosion!!!! The hanker'n for a huncka Moontrance :0 and as he ran for the Humi he tripped over the cords and pulled the whole darn thing off the table. He spent 2 petit coronas figuring out how to hook it back up. :laugh: :laugh: :p
 
Downloading porn. Failed to protect his keyboard with a splash gaurd and the "Fluids" released shorted out his PC.
 
Josh was surfing the CP website on his laptop in stall #1 when Bombtek entered stall #2.

Link
 
Simple: His computer isn't really broken.


Someone visiting his humble abode noticed how nice his computer was and offered him a box of Siglo VIs for the whole set up. Of course he took the deal.


He general litigates for these type of things but got tired of all the paperwork.



CYG
 
Top