I have been dating this girl for almost 2 years. She was the love of my life. She was younger that I am. Her being 23 and I being 32. She had graduated college and was an RN in the OB unit at our local hospital. Her family was well off, and she wasn't doing to bad herself. We had a great relationship, we could pick on each other, and talk bad to each other knowing that neither of us actually meant it, and always laughed it off (great sex too, by the way) We also NEVER fought. I think that's where our problems started.
We were at my house last week. I had made a nice Italian dinner, and we ate and watched Batman Begins (she hadn't seen it yet). Afterwords we laid on the couch, and cuddled for a bit and talked. About 10 o'clock she left and went home. Not 10 minutes later I get a text message saying "We're to different I can't see you anymore." I then told her to get her ass back to my place so we could talk this out. After some persuasion, she came back to the house in tears. At first she wouldn't talk to me, but then she finally opened up and then all hell broke loose.
She gave me several reasons why she was leaving. 1. I don't want kids. (I do one day, just not now). 2. I don't go to church. (True, I just don't like the stuffy Southern Baptists who think they're better than you are.) 3. She thought she I treated her like a status symbol. I only paid attention to her when my friends were around. (Shouldn't that be the other way around?) After all this was brought up, I lost my mind! We started screaming and yelling at each other about this and that and putting each other down and calling names.
To calm down, I went to the fridge and grabbed a Sam Adams, and went to the humidor and grabbed one of my Don Lino Africa's (the shorties) I lit it up and took a couple of sips, and let out a sigh trying like hell to calm down. She walked up to the patio table and said "...And that's the biggest problem of all!!! You put more into your cigar collection then you do to our relationship!!" She snatched my smoke out of my hand and threw it in the pool.
I sat there stunned while she ran back in the house. When I walked back inside, I looked on the bar, and my 75 count humi was gone. I yelled her name, and I got no answer. Then I heard what sounded like the garbage disposal turn on. I didn't want to believe it. I ran into the kitchen and she was putting my cigars in the garbage disposal. I screamed "Hey!" and she acted like she didn't even hear. Still stuffing smokes down the disposal. (and that thing was slap full, by the way). I saved 2 cigars from this massacre. An Acid Blondie, and a White Owl Grape. ( I was saving these for my idiot friends, they're not mine)
When I asked her what the hell she thought she was doing, she took my humidor, and pushed me aside. She ran out in the front yard and threw it on the concrete driveway, pretty much destroying it. She said that was payback for not taking her out to dinner enough, but buying cigars instead. The neighbors heard the commotion outside and called the cops. When they came, they told me they would have to report in to my Chief.
Well to end this account, I am now on 30 days unpaid leave, single and I have an Acid Blondie, and a grape White Owl. Being that I'm on unpaid leave I can't afford to buy anymore, and my habit is usually one a day. To this day she hasn't even called to say she was sorry for destroying all my cigars.
So that's my story... Some of it's true, some is not. Guess what's what.
