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How About Another N00b Contest?

Jeff B.

Jeff B.

NWMSU Mafia Hitman
Joined
Mar 8, 2005
Messages
524
Location
Starkville, MS
This is a contest for the newer guys around here...we'll say join date THIS YEAR (09) only.

The task: Make me laugh the hardest. Post a link in this tread to a youtube video, story, photo, or anything else. The content that makes me laugh the most wins a little newb package (nothing too fancy). This is pure luck, but if you think you can make me spit a beverage all over my screen, bring it on! (Let it be known I'm not difficult to please, so this should be fun! Plus everyone else gets to benefit from some funny content)

The only rule: ALL LINKS TO VIDEOS, ARTICLES OR ANYTHING ELSE MUST BE WORK SAFE. ANY LINK TO NUDITY OR OTHERWISE RAUNCHY CONTENT WILL BE DISQUALIFIED! Let's keep it on the up and up guys. :)

Deadline Extended. Keep em comin

Have fun guys :thumbs:
 
I'm not in the contest, but I laugh every time I look at this
fail-owned-mcchicken-vagina-fail.jpg


roadlinefail.jpg


facebitefail.jpg
 
Not work safe at all for content but figured it was valid because it is text only. This article got me kicked out of a calculus class because I could not stop laughing. Anyways, I straight up refuse to accept anything more from you Jeff, Post simply made me think of this and I had to share.

http://www.tuckermax.com/archives/entries/...ensue.phtml#278

-Edit

Just found this: http://games.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=0...31&from=rss (Take a good look at picture for article after reading)

and I agree with first post, "Do they make an adult model? Where's my checkbook...."
 
We'll just extend this one until some more newbies decide to step up! Also, edited to include join dates anytime in 2009. Fair enough?!?! :laugh:
 
This is a great contest idea! Thanks for the generous gesture. And thanks to all the rest of you for the laughs so far.

This one does have a bit of swearing in it (very little). But it certainly doesn't contain any nudity or raunchiness.

Enjoy!

LINK
 
The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate father to start their family. On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife good-bye and said, 'Well, I'm off now. The man should be here soon.'

Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer happened to ring the door bell, hoping to make a sale. 'Good morning, Ma'am', he said, 'I've come to...'

'Oh, no need to explain,' Mrs. Smith cut in, embarrassed, 'I've been expecting you.'

'Have you really?' said the photographer. 'Well, that's good. Did you know babies are my specialty?'

'Well that's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat!

After a moment she asked, blushing, 'Well, where do we start?'

'Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch, and perhaps a couple on the bed. And sometimes the living20room floor is fun. You can really spread out there. '

'Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work for Harry and me!'

'Well, Ma'am, none of us can guarantee a good one every time.. But if we try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results.'

'My, that's a lot!', gasped Mrs. Smith.

'Ma'am, in my line of work a man has to take his time. I'd love to be in and out in five minutes, but I'm sure you'd be disappointed with that.'

'Don't I know it,' said Mrs. Smith quietly.

The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby pictures. 'This was done on the top of a bus,' he said.

'Oh, my God!' Mrs. Smith exclaimed, grasping at her throat.

'And these twins turned out exceptionally well - when you consider the ir mother was so difficult to work with..'

'She was difficult?' asked Mrs. Smith.
'Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to the park to get the job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep to get a good look'

'Four and five deep?' said Mrs. Smith, her eyes wide with amazement.

'Yes', the photographer replied. 'And for more than three hours, too. The mother was constantly squealing and yelling - I could hardly concentrate, and when darkness approached I had to rush my shots. Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I ju st had to pack it all in.'

Mrs. Smith leaned forward. 'Do you mean they actually chewed on your, uh...equipment?'

'It's true, Ma'am, yes.. Well, if you're ready, I'll set-up my tripod and we can get to work right away.'

'Tripod?'

'Oh yes, Ma'am. I need to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big to be held in the hand very long.'
Mrs. Smith fainted.
 
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