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Smokyballs

I never got used to it. I'll never get used to it. Keep fighting 'til you can't stand it any more.

Doc
 
Good! Keep up that fighting spirit! Also, have her look at what's going on at Washington U Medical Center and particularly the Siteman Cancer Center.
 
Damn Brad, not the news I was hoping to hear. You've got the will and attitude to beat this, so don't give up.
 
Hated seeing it on FB and hate seeing it here. Sorry to hear Mr. Balls. Thinking of you and hoping you keep driving on. You never know what can happen if you keep at it. Thanks for taking time to let us know what's up.
 
Brad, this news was a shock. I've been away from CP far too long it seems.
Keep fighting and leave no stone unturned.
I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
 
I never know what to say about things like this. :(

Never stop hoping. Always believe. Know you are loved. Know others are pulling for, or praying for, or hoping the best for you. But leave nothing undone, and nothing unsaid. Face it all on your own terms.

Strength and weal and luck and all the best to you.

~Boar
 
So clinical trials are ment to help with cancer research. There are levels of these trials determine what point the research is at. As helpful as my involvement in might be in the trials it's not going to help me with my situation. As selfish as this is (my nature is to help others) I don't want to go through this process. I have had enough. A major surgery removing a foot of my colon and a baseball sized tumor started my journey. 22 rounds of chemo with hideous side effects which produce no lasting results. Two chemo embolism that are extremely painful and once again produce no lasting results. Two months of a pill based chemo that have no results. I'm a fighter. I've put up with a lot of shit with this disease. I can't do anymore but these trials. I don't want to spend the rest of the quality time I could spend with my friends and family being tortured with side effects. I also will have to be away from my family. Sick, miserable and alone is not how I want go out. I will deal with the sick and miserable in my own way but it will be at home with my family. I would really like to thank the people that have looked into the trials for us. I just can't justify taking the remaining healthy time away from my family for something that will not help me in the end. I'm going to try to remain as healthy as I can (this weekend is not included, I am really excited and don't plan on being anything but fun). I really love you all and I don't know how I would have gotten to this point without your support.
 
Brad I'm bummed out by this news, but glad that you are making a quality of life decision for you and your family. Look forward to catching up with you this weekend. I know you are a fighter and will enjoy every moment!
 
I can respect that choice. I hate seeing these things happen to good people. Please know that even though I don't know you personally, I'll be thinking of you and your family.
 
Hated reading it, but understand. Best to you and your family Mr. Balls. I'll never forget the Padron Herf of 2007, and meeting you there.
 
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