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The five most dangerous things in the Navy

Devil Doc

Devil Doc

When Death smiles, Corpsmen smile back
Joined
Oct 16, 2005
Messages
11,594
A Seaman saying, "I learned this in Boot Camp..."

A Petty Officer saying, "Trust me, sir..."

A Lieutenant JG saying, "Based on my experience..."

A Lieutenant saying, "I was just thinking..."

A Chief chuckling, "Watch this shit..."

Doc.
 
Pretty much the same in the Air Force. Different ranks, but same grades.
 
This is one of my favorites:

A man fell asleep on the beach. He woke up several hours later and suffered a severe sunburn to his legs and was taken to the closest hospital, which happened to be a U.S. Naval Hospital.

His skin had turned a bright red and was very painful and had started to blister. Anything that touched his legs caused agony. The lead on the medical staff at the naval hospital, that night, was a Chief Corpsman, in the emergency room. The Chief checked him out and then prescribed continued intravenous feedings of water, electrolytes, a mild sedative, and Viagra.

Rather astounded, the 3rd class corpsman, who was with the Chief inquired, "What good will Viagra do him in that condition?"

The Chief replied, "It'll keep the sheet off his legs."

Doc.
 
Devil Doc said:
This is one of my favorites:

A man fell asleep on the beach. He woke up several hours later and suffered a severe sunburn to his legs and was taken to the closest hospital, which happened to be a U.S. Naval Hospital.

His skin had turned a bright red and was very painful and had started to blister. Anything that touched his legs caused agony. The lead on the medical staff at the naval hospital, that night, was a Chief Corpsman, in the emergency room. The Chief checked him out and then prescribed continued intravenous feedings of water, electrolytes, a mild sedative, and Viagra.

Rather astounded, the 3rd class corpsman, who was with the Chief inquired, "What good will Viagra do him in that condition?"

The Chief replied, "It'll keep the sheet off his legs."

Doc.
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LOL! Awesome one Doc!
 
Doc, I love it when you've in one of these moods that you've been in for the past few days. It's almost brought a little bit of that normalcy CP use to have, back for a little while.
 
Jonesy said:
Doc, I love it when you've in one of these moods that you've been in for the past few days. It's almost brought a little bit of that normalcy CP use to have, back for a little while.
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An Idle mind is the Devil's workshop. Or is that addled?

Doc.
 
An old Chief and an old Gunny were sitting at the VFW arguing about who'd had the tougher career. "I did 30 years in the Corps," the Gunny declared proudly, "and fought in three of my country's wars. Fresh out of boot camp I hit the beach at Okinawa, clawed my way up the blood soaked sand, and eventually took out an entire enemy machine gun nest with a single grenade. "As a sergeant, I fought in Korea alongside General Mac Arthur. We pushed back the enemy inch by bloody inch all the way up to the Chinese border, always under a barrage of artillery and small arms fire. "Finally, as a gunny sergeant, I did three consecutive combat tours in Vietnam. We humped through the mud and razor grass for 14 hours a day, plagued by rain and mosquitoes, ducking under sniper fire all day and mortar fire all night. In a fire fight, we'd fire until our arms ached and our guns were empty, then we'd charge the enemy with bayonets!"
"Ah," said the Chief with a dismissive wave of his hand, "all shore duty, huh?

Doc.
 
That one was great too. In all truth, I'll do shore duty, being on a ship sucks.
 
Devil Doc said:
An old Chief and an old Gunny were sitting at the VFW arguing about who'd had the tougher career. "I did 30 years in the Corps," the Gunny declared proudly, "and fought in three of my country's wars. Fresh out of boot camp I hit the beach at Okinawa, clawed my way up the blood soaked sand, and eventually took out an entire enemy machine gun nest with a single grenade. "As a sergeant, I fought in Korea alongside General Mac Arthur. We pushed back the enemy inch by bloody inch all the way up to the Chinese border, always under a barrage of artillery and small arms fire. "Finally, as a gunny sergeant, I did three consecutive combat tours in Vietnam. We humped through the mud and razor grass for 14 hours a day, plagued by rain and mosquitoes, ducking under sniper fire all day and mortar fire all night. In a fire fight, we'd fire until our arms ached and our guns were empty, then we'd charge the enemy with bayonets!"
"Ah," said the Chief with a dismissive wave of his hand, "all shore duty, huh?

Doc.
Click to expand...


Never been on a boat myself, but from what I gather from those that have is that Marines do nothing but workout and eat. Don't think I'd mind that one bit...
 
Let's not forget the 2 most dangerous things in the Corps:

A Private with a screwdriver and a 2ndLt with and idea
 
Devil Doc said:
Jonesy said:
Doc, I love it when you've in one of these moods that you've been in for the past few days. It's almost brought a little bit of that normalcy CP use to have, back for a little while.
Click to expand...
An Idle mind is the Devil's workshop. Or is that addled?

Doc.
Click to expand...

I'll vote "addled!" Doc, there are some funny posts coming out of ya lately, you must be farting sunshine and rainbows after your morning dose of coffee and pink unicorn omelet!
 
I'll add that in the Army the most dangerous thing was a 2nd Lieutenant with a map. Of course that was back in the day when I was in. Nowadays I suppose GPS takes the butter-bars off the hook.
 
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