• Hi Guest - Come check out all of the new CP Merch Shop! Now you can support CigarPass buy purchasing hats, apparel, and more...
    Click here to visit! here...

This could be the dumbest joke ever..

BrownDevil

BrownDevil

BOTL
Joined
Jun 30, 2004
Messages
3,257
In case any of you don't know what an alpaca is, this is it:



alpaca7b.jpg


Joke:

Momma alpaca says to little boy alpaca, "Son, would you like some money for school?" Little boy alpaca says, "No thank you mom, alpaca lunch" :laugh: :laugh:

Dumb yes, but when you AND your wife/GF/whatever can't sleep and it's 4:30 in the morning, tell this joke to her and it will turn into the funniest thing you've ever heard :p

I'd love to hear anyone top this horrible joke :thumbs:
 
this came from the mouth of my 7 year old daughter.....

why did tigger stick his head in the toilet?



......he was looking for pooh.
 
marcsheldon said:
this came from the mouth of my 7 year old daughter.....

why did tigger stick his head in the toilet?



......he was looking for pooh.
[snapback]170723[/snapback]​
Click to expand...

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :sign:
 
Hmmmm, I think the heat is getting to ya Robert. :rolleyes: :laugh: :laugh:
 
Only 75 degrees brother....ask me again in a few months when it'll be 40 degrees hotter :p
 
you know, BD, I thought your joke was pretty bad, but then you reminded me of how anything can be funny when you're deliriously slap-happy and exhausted:
BrownDevil said:
...when you AND your wife/GF/whatever can't sleep and it's 4:30 in the morning, tell this joke to her and it will turn into the funniest thing you've ever heard  :p
[snapback]170716[/snapback]​
Click to expand...
...I know exactly the feeling you're describing there. if I imagine myself in that mental state, then you're the new chris rock! :p
 
Okay, I finally remembered one .... this is hilarious after drinking way too much Pinot Noir.
.
How do you catch a unique rabbit?
.
U-nique up on it very very quietly.
.
:cool:
 
OK since I've been up all night and am about to retire off to bed for a few hours....I'll end on this tacky note and check in later.

This may be in bad taste but it was much funnier when superman was still with us.

(clears throat)
What's the opposite of Christopher Reeve? Christopher Walken :laugh: :0
 
NorCalCigarLover said:
Okay, I finally remembered one .... this is hilarious after drinking way too much Pinot Noir.
.
How do you catch a unique rabbit?
.
U-nique up on it very very quietly.
.
:cool:
[snapback]170739[/snapback]​
Click to expand...


Q:What do you call a wandering priest? ??? ??? ??? ??? ???



A:A Roman Catholic :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :p
 
What do you call a cow with no legs?


Ground Beef!!!
 
Let's see, bad jokes... :whistling:

Q. What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other?
A. Ilene

Q. What do you call a man with no arms or legs, hanging on the wall?
A. Art

Q. What do you call a man with no arms or legs, swimming in a pool?
A. Bob

Q. What do you call a man with no feet?
A. Neal
 
What do you call a dog with no legs.

It doesn't matter he's not going to come to you anyway.
 
NorCalCigarLover said:
Okay, I finally remembered one .... this is hilarious after drinking way too much Pinot Noir.
.
How do you catch a unique rabbit?
.
U-nique up on it very very quietly.
.
:cool:
[snapback]170739[/snapback]​
Click to expand...

How do you catch a tame one.


The tame way. :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
 
How do you catch a bear?

Dig a big hole and fill it with ashes.

Line the perimeter with peas.

When the bear comes to take a pea kick him in the ash hole!

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:



Hey, you asked for bad. :blush: :p
 
Well I gotta say I think mine was still the worst, followed up by David's "llama think about it"

I'll let you know for sure though if I find myself awake again at 4:30am.

alpaca-personality.jpg
 
geldor1 said:
Let's see, bad jokes... :whistling:

Q. What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other?
A. Ilene

Q. What do you call a man with no arms or legs, hanging on the wall?
A. Art

Q. What do you call a man with no arms or legs, swimming in a pool?
A. Bob

Q. What do you call a man with no feet?
A. Neal
[snapback]170769[/snapback]​
Click to expand...
What do you call a Chinese women with one leg shorter than the other?
Irene!

Randyb1 said:
What do you call a dog with no legs.

It doesn't matter he's not going to come to you anyway.
[snapback]170775[/snapback]​
Click to expand...
What do you do with a dog with no legs?
Take him for a drag!
 
In a jungle of deepest darkest Africa in the summer of 1963, an expedition of scientists from the U.S. came across a species of animal never seen before. It was a furry little mammal about the size of a small walnut. It was so unusual and rare; they named it Rary (pronounced rare-e).

After taking it back to camp, they were astounded when Rary started speaking English! The scientists asked Rary how he learned to speak and Rary replied; “I just picked it up by listening to all of you.” Amazed, the scientists had so many more questions for their prized new discovery. They learned that as far as Rary knew, he was the only one of his kind in the world. They also discovered he was a very kind, compassionate and intelligent creature. However, there was one thing they soon discovered that cast a cloud over the discovery. You see, in the following few weeks, the “discovery of the ages” ate his weight in food and doubled in size every week. He was a carnivore and ate only raw meat.

Soon, Rary was the size of a basketball, then a medicine ball as he kept eating his weight in food. They decided to ship Rary off to the States for further study. After a few more weeks of studying, “Rary’s” size became a problem. The amount of food he was eating was becoming a drain on their budget; and the largest space at the San Diego zoo was soon too small to contain Rary. They decided to load Rary, now the size of 2 elephants, on a flat bed truck and take him out into the country and try and find a safe place for him to eat and live.

They asked Rary if he had any idea of how to slow his growth, but he had no clue. They told Rary that they didn’t know what to do, that they could not let this continue, that soon he would be just too big to feed and take care of. Rary soon became as big as any Dinosaur that ever lived and he just kept eating. The scientists had few options. They can’t keep feeding tons of beef to Rary and they couldn’t just let him roam around in the country. Soon they all agreed that they would have to end the life of this poor creature. Surprisingly, Rary agreed that ending his life was the only practical solution to this problem.

But how do we kill such a big creature? They first tried electricity, but the 10,000 volts they pumped into him didn’t faze him. Next they tried a Tomahawk missile, but that did nothing but bounce off. The next thing they did was load Rary onto a double wide flat bed and trucked him out to the Grande Canyon. The floor of the canyon was very deep and barren and if the fall didn’t kill him, he would certainly starve to death. The scientists said their last goodbyes and Rary kept reassuring them that this was the only logical thing to do.

Soon Rary was taken out to the edge of the canyon and was asked if he had any last words. He looked at the scientists and then looked down into the canyon and said.........
:
:
:
:
:
That’s a Long Way To Tip a Rary".
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top