Thought’s Dad Joke Thread

[behike]

This one has @cohibasurfer written all over it

 

[Scap]

View attachment 104879

This one has @cohibasurfer written all over it

Clock liquor tit shitter?

 

[behike]

Clock liquor tit shitter?

5 to 4 -- bottom fifth -- one out -- no one on

 

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[bfreebern]

My son has started an EMT program and is having to learn a ton of medical terms. I pulled the ultimate Dad joke on him and his Mom last night, I'm sure it's been posted here before.

I asked them both: "What's the difference between a hormone and an enzyme?"

They both had confused looks on their faces: "You can't hear an enzyme". Took my wife a minute and I did have to repeat the punch line a few times for my son, before he got an embarrassed look on his face.

 

[dawgie]

 

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[rbbrock]

 

[kann]

Q: What do you call it when you run across one of your old cock socks on New Year's Day?

A: A blast from the past.

 

[Scap]

What do you do with 365 used condoms?


Melt em down and call it a Goodyear.

 

[Eqwhipped]

 

[CigarStone]

 

[dawgie]

 

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[Thoughts]

View attachment 105156

 

[CigarStone]

When people say they lost their husband/wife, I always wonder how hard they tried to find them?

 

[CBoukal]

When people say they lost their husband/wife, I always wonder how hard they tried to find them?

not hard

 

[CigarStone]

A young Indian boy asked his father how Indians get their name. His father said

"when the baby is born the father looks out of the tee pee and the first thing he sees becomes the child's name"

"Why do you ask this, Two Dogs Fucking?"