• Hi Guest - Come check out all of the new CP Merch Shop! Now you can support CigarPass buy purchasing hats, apparel, and more...
    Click here to visit! here...

Reluctant admission

We're all here if you need an ear to listen. I would also like to add my two cents about counseling. I went through something similar many years ago and it made the path easier to walk.
Prayers and Godspeed.
This!

If you find that you cannot get out of that fog on your own, then counseling is definitely not something to be ashamed of. I too was in a similar situation about 20 or more years ago. Not physical, but mentally/verbally abusive. It’s pretty sad how living through something like that I can make your self worth, and will to live a pretty low value. I did counseling when we were split up technically, but before she moved out. It helped me a lot, and I realized that I did deserve better, and it all would be ok.

I’ve got lots of advice John. I’m happy to share with you. I’m not just talking about what you’re going through now, but what happens after the divorce. Things such as you trying to be a good father, but the ex-wife that wants to use the children as a pawn to hurt you when it really just hurts the children. Things like that, and what I learned through my journey.

If it hadn’t of been for @britishfields being the one to stand up and say “That’s not acceptable”, I would have let my ex do whatever she wanted. She still had that power over me. I didn’t see it then, but I can now.

Good luck and you know where to find me. ?
 
This!

If you find that you cannot get out of that fog on your own, then counseling is definitely not something to be ashamed of. I too was in a similar situation about 20 or more years ago. Not physical, but mentally/verbally abusive. It’s pretty sad how living through something like that I can make your self worth, and will to live a pretty low value. I did counseling when we were split up technically, but before she moved out. It helped me a lot, and I realized that I did deserve better, and it all would be ok.

I’ve got lots of advice John. I’m happy to share with you. I’m not just talking about what you’re going through now, but what happens after the divorce. Things such as you trying to be a good father, but the ex-wife that wants to use the children as a pawn to hurt you when it really just hurts the children. Things like that, and what I learned through my journey.

If it hadn’t of been for @britishfields being the one to stand up and say “That’s not acceptable”, I would have let my ex do whatever she wanted. She still had that power over me. I didn’t see it then, but I can now.

Good luck and you know where to find me. ?

Thanks John! I appreciate your advice and will reach out to you in the near future.
 
It takes a man to admit that he needs help. I've trod similar paths and I want you to know like jfields said that it will get better. Your being pushed to the emotional limit by a woman day after day isn't good for anyone including your daughters, you've made the right choice without a doubt. God bless you sir, and don't underestimate the power of prayer and putting it all in the hands of The Big Guy upstairs.
 
It's always worse when kids are involved but difficult any way you cut it. Only gets better once you decide, though. So hang in there!

One of the biggest mistakes I made as a parent was thinking I could handle everything myself. I was reticent to ask for help due to my pride and ignorance. I now know that kids sometimes need someone besides a parent to talk to because of the baggage all relationships carry. They sometimes just can't open up to a parent the way they may be able to with a stranger. That was hard. It hurt to realize that.

That being said, it may be hard to find someone to to whom they will open up. I got lucky with my youngest daughter and found a young woman she trusted. Food for thought, I hope. Best of luck, brother.
 
Glad to see you got an appointment to see a counselor, focus your energy on your daughter when you can , when you don't have her find somewhere to focus (ie models, puzzles, volunteer ect)
It will all work out in the end
 
Best to you, brother. Keep your head up. When there's only one decision, it's the right decision. Keep your daughters first and foremost in everything, be it there personal well-being, as well as their relationship with you. As many have said, don't hesitate to reach out if you feel you need someone to talk to. Keep on, man. Keep on.
 
Top