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Today's Smoke 2026

E.P. Carrillo Pledge Sojourn

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The Troublemaker in a Greek Cafe

What about to tell you applies exclusively here in Greece mainly to natives and how they behave, in Greek Cafes abroad or for 2nd-3rd generation Greeks who go to Cafe in other countries abroad, things are different. The customs and traditions here are different from other countries, so some things may be strange to you because you grew up in a different environment. Here, the person sitting next to you it's not a non-participant man, he "has the right" to ask you gently something (information about the cigar/smoking pipe/Kompoloi etc), to make an observation or to ask you assistance in something, ALL within the bounds of logic.
If he is accompanied by a GR woman and a problem arises, she is the first to tell him to lower his voice, to watch his manners, and if things get a little out of hand, she will tell him "you've have been embarrassed me-everyone is looking at us-let's go,I'm not sitting here any more" etc.
When someone creates a problem, first of all the person next to them will make an observation, then the same from other tables, then the waitress will come to talk to him personally and if it continues, in an extreme case, the Owner will come.
In type A cafes, as I have described to you before, there is a manager like the ones we see in movies (smiling, polite, often with a servile attitude who tries to reconcile things) but in type B and C cafes, there is not.
The Owner comes to solve the problem, he doesn't say much, he is determined to finish the whole issue and protect his investment (if he loses his regular customers to a random customer who creates a problem, he will close his shop). He is always a man of at least 45-50 years old, serious look with connections to the Police and even the Underworld. He will speak straight with no laughter etc and without giving much room for long discussion, any situation must be ended ''on the spot'' because it affects the good functioning of the Cafe and its reputation is at stake.

The Troublemaker is not just someone who "doesn't fit" in the space, he is an antisocial person, he is someone who behaves as is ''own the place" without giving importance to others even though he understands that his behaviour creates a problem.
Before I give you some examples, let me tell you that "prank" videos like these on social media where someone dressed as a beggar goes to enter a luxury restaurant, the waiter stops him, then he goes back in a Lamborghini, asks for the manager, who with a bow of the neck ask an apology, tells him he will fire the waiter because he behaved like that, etc, do not make any sense here. If someone intentionally creates such a scene, not only will they not get "likes" but they will start cursing them in the comments below and it is very likely that the owner of the store will sue him "for slanderous defamation".
I have told you before that BEFORE you enter a Cafe here you know what you will face, everything is visible from afar so that later if you don't like something there is NO possibility of being able to change the situation.
If you go to a C Cafe next to a college or a High School or in areas where Roma people live, expect loud music and noise, if you go in a suit and tie and a laptop to study a deal and can not find even a moment of peace, who's to blame?
If you go to a Cafe and the sign says ''Arabian Nights'', it's full of Arabs (usually muslims) smoking hookahs and you want to take your girlfriend there for a first romantic date while she gets dizzy from the the smoke, who's to blame?
If you go to a A cafe where there are politicians with police escorts, prominent businesswomen with bodyguards, lawyers with great reputation etc. and you start behaving as if you're at some folk festival, who's to blame if they soon ''escort you'' out?

1) Two locals come in, sit down and immediately start talking and laughing loudly, taking phone calls with loud ringing volume, etc. The guy next to them will ask them to be more quiet because their behaviour bothers him and all the others too, they often comply, but sometimes continue the same attitude, then the waitress will come and later the Owner and after a brief conversation they say, "then we won't come here again," ,the Owner calmly tells them that this is how this Cafe works and he can't change the rules.

2) Two-three non-locals come in and immediately start talking loudly, pushing each other (probably knocking over a glass) swearing and often talking on their cell phones with the speaker on.
It's only a matter of time before the person next to them asks them to be quiet, and if they continue, the waitress will come and then the Owner, as I told you above. He will tell them to lower their voices and their cell phones, that this is a Cafe and not Havra-stadium-concert venue etc, and to be mindful of their manners because they disturb all the other customers.
They often comply, but sometimes they say with hype in broken Greek, "Me pay, Me customer," and the Owner replies straight to them that everyone else around is a customer, they don't have any special privilege to behave like this and if they don't like it in the future, they can go somewhere else.

3) A local with expensive clothes, a gold watch (usually overweight) comes in, sits down and immediately his cell phone starts ringing loudly and talking loudly: "come to my office tomorrow to sign a contract-call the minister and tell him the deal is ready-driver, go to the garage and pick up my Porsche" etc. He who sit beside will make an observation to him that this is not his office to behave like this but a Cafe with people who came to calm down, if he continues he will ask the waitress to change his position, everyone else in the Cafe will start to look at him sideways and so either he will understand on his own that he has become a disgrace and will change his behaviour or if he continues the Owner should tell him straight up to lower his cell phone and his voice tone because he is creating a problem for everybody around.
He often acts that he is offended and asks for the bill, the Owner doesn't seem to care since 1-2 such customers can cause him financial damage.

In the future I will tell you about the tricks that some idiot "hygienists" do when they sit in the outdoor (a smoking) area and try with various silly tricks to intimidate us to make us stop smoking or change position. I am sure you will find their tricks funny, but also how we silence them with our answers.

PS: Long post which made me tired (english is not my primary language), as for the topic i am smoking in the balcony Guantanamera Cristales, double Greek coffee plus cool water beside me.
 
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