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Bomb etiquette

I hadn't noticed these posts to this thread until today. Interesting reading and even more interesting assumptions...
 
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GrouchoM said:
I hadn't noticed these posts to this thread until today. Interesting reading and even more assuming...
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And have you considered why certain folks might assume? You may not feel obligated to answer certain questions, but that will not change certain perceptions. Your choice, of course. Why not consider changing those perceptions?
 
No explanation? You say you have read all of it, but never even offer up a bit of an answer.
 
Please explain, clearly, why your post was cut and pasted into at least three other forums, and why you felt the need to edit your OP.
 
GrouchoM said:
I hadn't noticed these posts to this thread until today. Interesting reading and even more interesting assumptions...
Click to expand...

Hmm... So despite the multiple times people quoted your post (causing notifications when you log in), and despite the fact that you literally asked a question, presumably one you desired an answer for, you didn't notice these posts on this thread? I'm sorry. I find that incredibly hard to believe.

This is verging on completely ridiculous.
 
GrouchoM said:
Wise words @MadMonk, wise words indeed.
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You've been given many wise words here. It boggles my mind after reading your comments here on CP, and the countless other boards, that you are sincere in wanting to be a contributing member. You claim you were bombed by someone asking you to not disclose their identity, yet to anyone with half a brain it is obvious that it was a half assed, lame attempt to have someone bomb you. You almost had one of us, ALMOST. CP isn't like other boards full of yahoos trying to gloat, out shine each other, or have perpetual never ending pissing contests. If you're sincere you'll own up, apologize and follow some wise words which were given to you previously. Read more, post less. If you're NOT a troll, you'll be the bigger man and realize CP IS NOT LIKE ANY OTHER PLACE. PERIOD.

Edit: SP
 
CMontoya79 said:
You've been given many wise words here. It boggles my mind after reading your comments here on CP, and the countless other boards, that you are sincere in wanting to be a contributing member. You claim you were bombed by someone asking you to not disclose their identity, yet to anyone with half a brain it is obvious that it was a half assed, lame attempt to have someone bomb you. You almost had one of us, ALMOST. CP isn't like other boards full of yahoos trying to gloat, out shine each other, or have perpetual never ending pissing contests. If you're sincere you'll own up, apologize and follow some wise words which were given to you previously. Read more, post less. If you're NOT a troll, you'll be the bigger man and realize CP IS NOT LIKE ANY OTHER PLACE. PERIOD.

Edit: SP
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Agreed. You yourself have been a stand up guy from day one. But, we disagree on elements of my said character. I haven't trolled anyone. If you read my post on other boards and even this one I've posted less, just my pics of my daily smokes. No inquires or solicitations (which I'm offended by the claim, but that's my issue). I've read threads and done little else since our last exchange. But, everyone wants to post what they think I'm about, so if I answer or not I still get people taking shots (so why offer myself up to the mob). I've responded to you because as I've said you've been insistence on helping me find my way, but I can't say that about the rest. Apologize? I didn't come in as gracefully as I could have, but I've been respectful in my few responses and not tried to make this worse, but I'm not going to cower over a mistake. Also, if I'm so devious as everybody goes to instead of saying maybe he did get bombed and didn't have the guys online handle, but as I stated a note saying posting pics are not done. But, nobody will even try to conceive what I said was the truth. I again will write the bomber a personal handwritten note and keep it as he has asked discrete. But, go back and read the posts, everybody offered advice, not sympathy or an in for smokes, which is all I required. So, again what is my transgression? Everytime a member has offered advice I took it, even the mistakes, sadly that doesn't appear to be enough. I will never admit to something I didn't do. I bear no one any ill will nor malice, but no one here can make decisions for me or say I kept harassing them after a interaction asking about anything but advice-again, which I've taken-look at my posts. But, no one wants to take full measure of my time here. So, what is it participate, but as forum members dictate, stop being me, hardly.

I've soured on defending myself. But, someone will post my words and attempt use to use against me with a crack that I wasn't contrite enough. Like, I said you've been a fine example and been standup, but even you has mischaracterized my actions, like others flittering through just to take a another shot or crack. So, it appears it shall remain.
 
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GrouchoM said:
Agreed. You yourself have been a stand up guy from day one. But, we disagree on elements of my said character. I haven't trolled anyone. If you read my post on other boards and even this one I've posted less, just my pics of my daily smokes. No inquires or solicitations (which I'm offended by the claim, but that's my issue). I've read threads and done little else since our last exchange. But, everyone wants to post what they think I'm about, so if I answer or not I still get people taking shots (so why offer myself up to the mob). I've responded to you because as I've said you've been insistence on helping me find my way, but I can't say that about the rest. Apologize? I didn't come in as gracefully as I could have, but I've been respectful in my few responses and not tried to make this worse, but I'm not going to cower over a mistake. Also, if I'm so devious as everybody goes to instead of saying maybe he did get bombed and didn't have the guys online handle, but as I stated a note saying posting pics are not done. But, nobody will even try to conceive what I said was the truth. I again will write the bomber a personal handwritten note and keep it as he has asked discrete. But, go back and read the posts, everybody offered advice, not sympathy or an in for smokes, which is all I required. So, again what is my transgression? Everytime a member has offered advice I took it, even the mistakes, sadly that doesn't appear to be enough. I will never admit to something I didn't do. I bear no one any ill will nor malice, but no one here can make decisions for me or say I kept harassing them after a interaction asking about anything but advice-again, which I've taken-look at my posts. But, no one wants to take full measure of my time here. So, what is it participate, but as forum members dictate, stop being me, hardly.

I've soured on defending myself. But, someone will post my words and attempt use to use against me with a crack that I wasn't contrite enough. Like, I said you've been a fine example and been standup, but even you has mischaracterized my actions, like others flittering through just to take a another shot or crack. So, it appears it shall remain.
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No one on here is looking to take a shot or crack at you. All that was asked for was an explanation. "If you were in fact bombed by whom and did you properly thank them for said bomb?" That was all that was asked. If the bomber wished to stay anonymous then that should have been stated. If you didn't know the handle of the bomber you could have reached out to a number of members here who would have gladly pointed you in the right direction, if it was someone from this board, and even possibly one of the others you are on. You have stopped asking for cigars which is great; however, you still have not answered what everyone was asking once this mess got started. Nor have you apologized for your actions, the deleting of posts, editing out threads and asking for/demanding cigars. We all make mistakes, to feel you don't warrant the community an apology for said mistakes is now part of the problem. If you don't like how things are handled here or what the expectations of our members/family are then maybe this isn't the right board for you. If that is the case please move on, stop posting completely and find a board that better suits your needs. If it is, then its time to act like an adult, apologize and lay all the cards on the table even if it means reaching out to an established member to see how to take care of it and start being a part of the community.

edited cause i can't use commas
 
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GrouchoM said:
Agreed. You yourself have been a stand up guy from day one. But, we disagree on elements of my said character. I haven't trolled anyone. If you read my post on other boards and even this one I've posted less, just my pics of my daily smokes. No inquires or solicitations (which I'm offended by the claim, but that's my issue). I've read threads and done little else since our last exchange. But, everyone wants to post what they think I'm about, so if I answer or not I still get people taking shots (so why offer myself up to the mob). I've responded to you because as I've said you've been insistence on helping me find my way, but I can't say that about the rest. Apologize? I didn't come in as gracefully as I could have, but I've been respectful in my few responses and not tried to make this worse, but I'm not going to cower over a mistake. Also, if I'm so devious as everybody goes to instead of saying maybe he did get bombed and didn't have the guys online handle, but as I stated a note saying posting pics are not done. But, nobody will even try to conceive what I said was the truth. I again will write the bomber a personal handwritten note and keep it as he has asked discrete. But, go back and read the posts, everybody offered advice, not sympathy or an in for smokes, which is all I required. So, again what is my transgression? Everytime a member has offered advice I took it, even the mistakes, sadly that doesn't appear to be enough. I will never admit to something I didn't do. I bear no one any ill will nor malice, but no one here can make decisions for me or say I kept harassing them after a interaction asking about anything but advice-again, which I've taken-look at my posts. But, no one wants to take full measure of my time here. So, what is it participate, but as forum members dictate, stop being me, hardly.

I've soured on defending myself. But, someone will post my words and attempt use to use against me with a crack that I wasn't contrite enough. Like, I said you've been a fine example and been standup, but even you has mischaracterized my actions, like others flittering through just to take a another shot or crack. So, it appears it shall remain.
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Whoa Nellie!
Nobody asked you to apologize for something you didn't do. You were asked to clarify the situation. Your silence and the widespread distribution of your post verbatim, caused some to speculate. Your continued silence allowed the speculation to gain momentum.

"Whoa guys, totally not what I meant to convey."

"I came across some new information and changed my post. I didn't realize that here I should have amended it rather than deleting it."

Sentences similar to those are what was asked for. Not providing them while continuing to visit the board is what caused this to blow up. Whether the speculations were right, wrong or outlandish, you should consider that you helped them to grow by not responding to them.
Take a deep breath, re-read the questions and answer them. Debunk the myths. Get to know some of the people here. Some of my really close friends exist on this forum, and I've never met them face to face. All of the things that make this place what it is are yours to have, but they aren't just handed out as door prizes, you have to work for them.
 
Because I was a member on these 5 boards and I thought they would give me insight into what to do when a guy sends you 8 sticks that averaged $12 apiece with a note saying don't post and the norm is to do so on many forums. I don't have much to post about, and these sites run on content, even recycled questions, along with everybody offering assistance. I thought it would be a great opportunity to get feedback on a odd scenario. I post my sticks, post comments on accessories and reviews. Because it is the only content as a newbie I have to offer. But, it's nothing anybody is bound to care about or respond to...they can comment or not. Each site is different, one is full of ball busting pricks who make me laugh verbally abusing each other, one site is full of pretentious cigar nazis, one us full of true lovers of cigars, one has a huge membership of diverse cool guys, etc (and I've seen many members from this site on others). So, I decided to post my query to all of these universes expecting either the same or varied responses on how to proceed displaying gratitude for what was a significant gesture from a stranger who still remains mostly unidentified on a certain forum. I believe I know who he is, utilizing the state from his return address, but alas I don't want to embarrass him by doing a post nor a pm (because I still could be wrong) so a simple handwritten card will do. Also, for all of people saying it was an attention-seeking ploy. I curious how someone who says they all ready got one (a bomb)...prompts more...it's not logical...it doesn't make me viable for another person reading to say "cool, he got bombed I'll send him more" or to make me look cool in your eyes-I don't care what you think. Also, I don't think like that and believe no one else does. I just wanted to know that bomb senders regardless of the forum rules should have their requests honored, even if it is something seldomly done. Most people, if you read the posts replied to honor his request, others said they rarely did this, but will due to protecting themselves against claims of favoritism or to be seen as targets for soliciting, a few suprisingly called BS cause it not what they do (show the sticks they said), even more said I was working an angle. Despite it all, I got a lesson in how different forums, forum members think and a better handle on realizing while everybody's got an opinion, I can trust myself and a .45 cent post card more than some random posts from the internet. That's all I got, but didn't seem like "oops, didn't mean to do that or shouldn't have made people look for things that aren't there" would suffice. I deleted the original post feeling if I removed the offensive post, people will no longer be offended (we could move on) but I panicked and was told it was btr to take my beating like a man and I did by reestablishing the post, and fell silent to process this whole crapsicle, but the hobgoblin ran with it, not knowing the sequence of events. I spoke to some forum members privately and solicited advice on whether to lay low or keep on posting, others said post less. I decided to not fly to high or low and posted only my daily smokes and maybe like other member's post and comments, but I don't smoke Illusione or Patons, and lacking any real seasoning do think I'm qualified to comment on these, so I don't comment on others spectacular cigars nor mine, because I also feel now I'd be accused of slyly trying to beg. I just went and did a stripped down me, but even that pissed people off-hmmm? Well, if I wasn't sure pissing people off was my gift, I sure of it now. So I'll admit, I entered ungracefully, panicked at trying to cover my misteps, but I never went after anyone, nor said an unflattering word, even when I dared to speak for fear of it being misinterpreted (Frankenstein's monster never handed the villagers a torch and said set me ablaze). So, yeah, I can admit my culpability in this fiasco, but will Cigar Pass members who posted such lovely sharp barbs do the same. We shall all see, won't we gentle reader, as for me I choose to be joyful, because recently I forgot what that feels like, but I know I will feel it again, whether smoking a Tampa Trolley or Cohiba.
 
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I think we need to just let this one sit for a while. Either he'll come around and learn how to mesh with the membership here, or he'll keep the same "you guys are wrong, I'm right" attitude and will weed himself out.

You write eloquently and that is always welcomed here, but not when you're using it to try and backtalk the advice that has been given to you. It is only natural to defend your actions, but the best way to do it is always to say "You know what guys? Sorry I ruffled some feathers, I see what I did wasn't the best way to go about things, let me just hang back for a bit and I'll start posting again when I have the hang of how it works here."

Also, paragraphs help. Just plain ol' forum etiquette.
 
GrouchoM said:
Because I was a member on these 5 boards and I thought they would give me insight into what to do when a guy sends you 8 sticks that averaged $12 apiece with a note saying don't post and the norm is to do so on many forums. I don't have much to post about, and these sites run on content, even recycled questions, along with everybody offering assistance. I thought it would be a great opportunity to get feedback on a odd scenario. I post my sticks, post comments on accessories and reviews. Because it is the only content as a newbie I have to offer. But, it's nothing anybody is bound to care about or respond to...they can comment or not. Each site is different, one is full of ball busting pricks who make me laugh verbally abusing each other, one site is full of pretentious cigar nazis, one us full of true lovers of cigars, one has a huge membership of diverse cool guys, etc (and I've seen many members from this site on others). So, I decided to post my query to all of these universes expecting either the same or varied responses on how to proceed displaying gratitude for what was a significant gesture from a stranger who still remains mostly unidentified on a certain forum. I believe I know who he is, utilizing the state from his return address, but alas I don't want to embarrass him by doing a post nor a pm (because I still could be wrong) so a simple handwritten card will do. Also, for all of people saying it was an attention-seeking ploy. I curious how someone who says they all ready got one (a bomb)...prompts more...it's not logical...it doesn't make me viable for another person reading to say "cool, he got bombed I'll send him more" or to make me look cool in your eyes-I don't care what you think. Also, I don't think like that and believe no one else does. I just wanted to know that bomb senders regardless of the forum rules should have their requests honored, even if it is something seldomly done. Most people, if you read the posts replied to honor his request, others said they rarely did this, but will due to protecting themselves against claims of favoritism or to be seen as targets for soliciting, a few suprisingly called BS cause it not what they do (show the sticks they said), even more said I was working an angle. Despite it all, I got a lesson in how different forums, forum members think and a better handle on realizing while everybody's got an opinion, I can trust myself and a .45 cent post card more than some random posts from the internet. That's all I got, but didn't seem like "oops, didn't mean to do that or shouldn't have made people look for things that aren't there" would suffice. I deleted the original post feeling if I removed the offensive post, people will no longer be offended (we could move on) but I panicked and was told it was btr to take my beating like a man and I did by reestablishing the post, and fell silent to process this whole crapsicle, but the hobgoblin ran with it, not knowing the sequence of events. I spoke to some forum members privately and solicited advice on whether to lay low or keep on posting, others said post less. I decided to not fly to high or low and posted only my daily smokes and maybe like other member's post and comments, but I don't smoke Illusione or Patons, and lacking any real seasoning do think I'm qualified to comment on these, so I don't comment on others spectacular cigars nor mine, because I also feel now I'd be accused of slyly trying to beg. I just went and did a stripped down me, but even that pissed people off-hmmm? Well, if I wasn't sure pissing people off was my gift, I sure of it now. So I'll admit, I entered ungracefully, panicked at trying to cover my misteps, but I never went after anyone, nor said an unflattering word, even when I dared to speak for fear of it being misinterpreted (Frankenstein's monster never handed the villagers a torch and said set me ablaze). So, yeah, I can admit my culpability in this fiasco, but will Cigar Pass members who posted such lovely sharp barbs do the same. We shall all see, won't we gentle reader, as for me I choose to be joyful, because recently I forgot what that feels like, but I know I will feel it again, whether smoking a Tampa Trolley or Cohiba.
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Groucho as another new member of CP, maybe I can give you a little insight to participating and becoming a contributing member on cigar forums. I am new to CP, but not to cigar forums and belong to a few, but only what would be considered active on only a couple.

It is important to realize on any forum, many members have been forming friendships for many years and have gotten to know each other and truly feel like brothers. They have seen LOTS of newbies come and go. Most of these newbies come with good intentions of making friends and learning about cigars and all that includes. But sometimes newbies arrive thinking the forum can be a way to acquire free cigars from its generous members and they focus on how they can get freebies. That is a MAJOR taboo and will get the newbie kicked to the curb in a hurry and usually stomped along the journey to said curb. I have read some of your posts that could be construed as you being "That Guy". But I think I may have been wrong. Time will tell.

There are others who join a forum with the sole purpose of scamming the generosity of its members. Running for sale ads of desirable hard to find sticks for a good price and then taking the money and running. These guys are usually shot and buried in an unknown location. And since many forum members belong to a few cigar forum the reputation and M.O. Of these crooks travels the Internet and is remembered for a long time.

The one best advice I can share with you is to be honest with everyone. We all have ours warts and there is no shame in letting people know we have them. We often spend so much time and effort trying to cover them up so no one know we have them that they may think, "what's that guy hiding and what's his motive"? Just be honest and share your true self with others and those warts lose their power.

CigarPass does do somethings differently than other cigar forums. That makes it unique and the way the members like it. I don't post often yet and still read getting to know a little about the forum and its members. But what I have learned so far is CP is one of the good forums. Several forums I have encountered would have buried you from the get go. Your actions on MANY forums may have made the CP members suspicious, but for the most part just wanted you to explain yourself. Your silence or very abbreviated responses only fed their suspicions, and IMO rightfully so. I am glad to see you opening up and explaining yourself a little. Doing so is what will help you in building what you apparently crave, fitting in and becoming a part of the world of cigars. I hope you make it and look forward to watching you grow in the hobby. Be an open book with these people and you will gain their trust and friendship. CP members have impressed me with how they have dealt with you so realize your mistakes, learn from them and keep trying. And hey, at least you aren't buried in an unmarked grave outside of Vegas!
 
Dude. Nice explanation. Good job. You did forget to mention that your second or third post on here was something along the lines of: "give me my cut". Wether that was quoting a line from something or not, it was likely interpreted as poor form demanding an established member give you something.

Here at CP we have a true brotherhood/sisterhood, a family, order. There is almost nothing we wouldn't try and do for one another here. Young, old, black, white, brown, pink, wealthy, poor, lawyers, vets, cops, firefighters, docs, teachers, tech, government, Christian, Jewish etc, etc. we put our BS petty differences aside here to come together as one. There is only a handful of written rules, yet a handful more of unwritten rules. You figure the unwritten rules with time and patience, or if a fellow B/SOTL points them out.

Please do well, be right, kick back, try and enjoy it. Above all, learn.

Cut, light, enjoy, rinse, repeat.
 
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