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CONTEST TIME!

As a Dallas Cowboy fan, I know today is somewhat painful since the Eagles are playing the Vikings right now. So how about some anti-Eagle humor:

Q: How do you keep an Eagle out of your back yard?
A: Put up a goal post

Q: What is the difference between a dollar and the Eagles?
A: You can at least get 4 quarters out of a dollar

Q: What do tele-evangelists and the Eagles have in common?
A: They can both get people watching at home to stand up and shout "JESUS CHRIST!"

Q: What do you call an Eagle with a Superbowl ring?
A: Thief

Q: Why doesn't Allentown get an NFL team?
A: Because then Philly would want one too

Q: What do the Eagles and possum have in common?
A: Both play dead at home and get killed on the road

Q: What do you call 47 people sitting around the TV watching the Superbowl?
A: The Philadelphia Eagles

Q: Why was Donovan McNabb upset when his Philadelphia Eagles play book was stolen?
A: He hadn't finished coloring it yet


The Genius of Donovan McNabb
 
Wedding Day

garvey said:
As a Dallas Cowboy fan, I know today is somewhat painful since the Eagles are playing the Vikings right now. So how about some anti-Eagle humor:

Q: How do you keep an Eagle out of your back yard?
A: Put up a goal post

Q: What is the difference between a dollar and the Eagles?
A: You can at least get 4 quarters out of a dollar

Q: What do tele-evangelists and the Eagles have in common?
A: They can both get people watching at home to stand up and shout "JESUS CHRIST!"

Q: What do you call an Eagle with a Superbowl ring?
A: Thief

Q: Why doesn't Allentown get an NFL team?
A: Because then Philly would want one too

Q: What do the Eagles and possum have in common?
A: Both play dead at home and get killed on the road

Q: What do you call 47 people sitting around the TV watching the Superbowl?
A: The Philadelphia Eagles

Q: Why was Donovan McNabb upset when his Philadelphia Eagles play book was stolen?
A: He hadn't finished coloring it yet




The Genius of Donovan McNabb
Click to expand...

Ok, now those made ME laugh my a$$ off, the Wifey is an agles fan and you should hear her right now. :sign:
 
Not sure if you heard this one before, but it's one of the only jokes I remember. :D

A young couple is driving along having a heated argument. The girl has just found out her man has being cheating on her with alarming frequency. With a mad glint in her eye, she opens the glove box and takes out a sharp little pocket knife and slices off his Johnson. She then calmly rolls the window down amidst his painful screams and throws the useless husk out the window.

Traveling behind this car of catastrophe is a pickup truck driven by a wholesome father taking his little daughter to see grandma. The surprise package hits the windscreen suddenly and the little girls yells out in shock. The father, thinking quickly, uses the windscreen wipers to get rid of the evidence.

'Don't worry honey.' The Dad says assuredly. 'That was just an insect that hit the window.'

The daughter looks thoughtful for a couple of seconds.

'Must have had a huge penis then.'
 
I'm going to let this go til the end of work tomorrow. So far, Phil has made me laugh hysterically. I could hardly get through it.
 
Remember this guy Ben? (note the helmet :laugh:)

traumaart.png


PS. Phil gets all credit btw
 
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