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Problems on the home front

Cheekie

Cheekie

Yeah fuggers, I am still around!
Joined
Aug 15, 2005
Messages
838
Once we moved into the house we decided to give the 6 y/o a pet. We started with gold fish but after three belly ups we gave up on the fish, moving on to the sturdier cuddlier type. Trinity is a natural caretaker, when it comes to living creatures so I know for a fact it was not neglect upon her part. So off to find a hamster... We found an awsome hamster, she absolutely loved it, but, peril upon him once my two cats got the hair brained idea of wanting to play with him.... Long story short cats out! Since now they had the taste of blood in them and had gotten so pissed at the world they litterally pissed on the entire world...including school packpacks, homework, shoes and anything else at eye level for them. We get new hamster and new cage and now 6 mo later, MR. Hamster Croaks! I found him belly up in his wheel - all I can think of is he had some sort of heart attack- I got the 6 y/o out of the room and made her get ready in my room, not uttering a word about Mr hammy in the wheel, ushered her off to school and promptly replacing with a Mr Hammy look a like. Now the real quandry- Do I tell her the other hamster died?

Sorry for the post But, E is in due route with his bosses to a Conference and I don't want to call and bother him with home stuff unless it truly is an emergency. So alas... I needed to ask.
 
Ah, Cheekie the cycle of life talk for a six year old. How did you explain the fish episode? I would deal with it as the other hamster left us and a new one came to live with us because I know you loved your pet. Kids are pretty good with that type of scenario so I hope that helps you some.
 
Here's some good info - linky

I completly agree with the point, if the death is brought up - that it's best to say the
words 'death' or 'died' or 'dying'.

As far as should you tell her....when will you have a chance that's in a somewhat controlled environment.

All in all...you may want to discuss it with E.

I hope all works out well for you and the little-one!
 
I say tell her the truth now, and that the other Hamster passed away. It has always worked out better that way for us in the long run!

And next time, instead of a hamster, maybe a Guinea Pig. They seem to fair a bit better than hamsters do.
 
tone-ny said:
Ah, Cheekie the cycle of life talk for a six year old. How did you explain the fish episode? I would deal with it as the other hamster left us and a new one came to live with us because I know you loved your pet. Kids are pretty good with that type of scenario so I hope that helps you some.
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Yes- the fish were sick, we got them from a local dealer and they all got ick or swollen to the point that they didn't look like fish anymore. So she understood that, with the previous hamster it was the Cats... To which she swifty responded with bad kitties and get them out! Now this is unexplainable- there was no cause or reason.... To which then I don't want her assuming it was something she did or that her room is cursed- I know I know but it IS a 6 year old....they have a way of finding reasons, even if there weren't any to be had.
 
xRanger said:
I say tell her the truth now, and that the other Hamster passed away. It has always worked out better that way for us in the long run!

And next time, instead of a hamster, maybe a Guinea Pig. They seem to fair a bit better than hamsters do.
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Ditto! Kids are more resilient and intelligent than we sometimes give them credit for.
 
I don’t have kids so I’m not attempting to say my advice is expert here but I can say I grew up with dogs and they still haven’t died, the one is 17 years on her way out and to be honest I’ve never really had to deal with death in my life up until now, I don’t know how I’ll handle it. With that said maybe introducing to someone when there younger would help later in life.
 
I think telling her is defintely the way to go. Like somebody else said, it's the most controlled environment you'll probably be given for this lesson. My three year old is a farm girl, so she has way more knowledge on the whole circle of life than I would prefer. Learned about life and death both at the same time with a still born lamb. I'm just waiting for the "how did my baby brother get in mommy's tummy?"
 
:whistling:

13 Members: denverdog, tone-ny, smellysell, Mrepp, BlindedByScience, Ginseng, Dan66, junkman_56, Rod, jfields, xRanger, LilBastage, jabba
 
denverdog said:
:whistling:

13 Members: denverdog, tone-ny, smellysell, Mrepp, BlindedByScience, Ginseng, Dan66, junkman_56, Rod, jfields, xRanger, LilBastage, jabba
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Remember E is away TDY, so she needs help now! If you've been in the military you'd know this.
 
It would not be prudent for me to give advice. If you took it, and it didn't work, it would be my faut. But I will tell you this, her next pet needs to survive awhlile or she's apt to blame herself for the deaths.

Doc.
 
I think the truth is in order. She's 6 years old, right? I don't think she would have a problem with an honest explanation of what has happened. I know we want to shield our children form all that is bad in this world, but death really isn't bad, it's just a part of life. It's very likely that she'll be sad, but given a supportive environment to grieve in, I would think she would bounce back quickly.

Like has been said, kids are smarter and more resilient than most of us think. It's an important lesson to learn. This seems like a really good opportunity to do some teaching and parenting.

Of course, you know your child better than anyone else, so it is really a decision you must make.
 
Count me in on the explain it to her side. Part of having a pet is parting with it. I had a little cemetary in the backyard under the hydrangea bush when I was a kid.
 
I appreciate the responses, I spoke to E- he told me to tell her and I have. She was sad and for a moment angry and then she asked if she could have another Hammy - she lit up once she met the new guy.. we had a burial ceremony and she said good bye- WE will go pick some flowers later for the site. Thank you all for the support.
 
Cheekie said:
I appreciate the responses, I spoke to E- he told me to tell her and I have. She was sad and for a moment angry and then she asked if she could have another Hammy - she lit up once she met the new guy.. we had a burial ceremony and she said good bye- WE will go pick some flowers later for the site. Thank you all for the support.
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Very nice way to handle it!
 
Sounds like you handled it just fine. A nice burial ceremony is a good thing. I remember them from my childhood...one that stand out in particular was a friends dog with only him and me standing around the grave having a good cry....

A suggestion on pet rodents...Rats make much better pets (no, I'm not joking)...not regular rats that you find in your backyard, but lab rats that you can buy at the store for a couple of bucks. They are breed to be docile, they are cute as heck and they make great pets! My kids had a couple of them. They are actually much friendlier and easier to handle, have better dispositions, etc than hamsters/gerbals, etc. Plus they are dirt cheap....you can get a couple of babies at the local "reptile" pet store for next to nothing (they sell them as snake food).

Good luck!
 
jgohlke said:
Sounds like you handled it just fine. A nice burial ceremony is a good thing. I remember them from my childhood...one that stand out in particular was a friends dog with only him and me standing around the grave having a good cry....

A suggestion on pet rodents...Rats make much better pets (no, I'm not joking)...not regular rats that you find in your backyard, but lab rats that you can buy at the store for a couple of bucks. They are breed to be docile, they are cute as heck and they make great pets! My kids had a couple of them. They are actually much friendlier and easier to handle, have better dispositions, etc than hamsters/gerbals, etc. Plus they are dirt cheap....you can get a couple of babies at the local "reptile" pet store for next to nothing (they sell them as snake food).

Good luck!
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I agree on the rats, smarter, more resillient, and a helluva pet _ seriously!! But if I walked into E's house with a rat, me and the rat would be sitting on the corner looking at each other like " dude, now what?". E is OK ( at best ) with the hammy and goldfish approach. He hates all other animals other than DOGs, funny enough... I am a bulldog (english and amstaff ) sorta girl he is all lab all the time (although he has swayed towards a boxer). I have attempted to broach the reptile and spider/ insect talk but it never turns out good....
 
You went too fast. You should have dried it out, put it back on the wheel and say it's resting.





Just like Monty Python! :p
 
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