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The nastiest thing ever done at an Outlaw party

Smokyballs

Smokyballs

The nap master
Joined
Sep 29, 2005
Messages
2,514
So last Saturday we had one of our infamous parties at the Outlaw. Ashton was the vendor on hand with all kinds of deals on cigars. Free food, beer...you know the drill.
Apache Helicopter landing, scantly clad girls from Hooters, typical Outlaw fare! These bozos come into the store and set down in our lounge and start to drink. They decide that the fun contests we do during an event aren't fun enough. They decide that they will have a butt eating contest. Now before you get all excited, I'm talking CIGAR BUTTS!!! The first guy puts one in his mouth(mind you, these are not there cigars)out of the ashtray and gags and spits it out. The second guy calls him a wuss and proceeds to eat 3 butts. Now, the guy is now completely white and dashes into our kitchen and pukes in the sink. He then walks out of the store and pukes on the sidewalk and makes it just to his car before yaking again. All this for a bet with the owner of the store(he gave the guy one of our Tour packs). Worst thing I have ever witnessed in the 8 years for working at the store!
 
Oh man. That is about disgusting right there. Ugh, and not even their own butts :(
 
I told that guy if he pukes in the store he is cleaning it up.
Lucky for him he made it in the sink and trash can outside..................

Dumb ass.........
 
That's sufficiently revolting. I approve. :)
 
These people walk among us. They are everywhere.

Speaking of which...gonna go put this on right now:

IMG_0176.jpg
 
I guess I'm just a little different. I was laughing my ass off when I read Brads' post. :laugh:
 
jfields said:
I guess I'm just a little different. I was laughing my ass off when I read Brads' post. :laugh:
Click to expand...
X2. Stupid is as stupid does, they're good for intertainment. :whistling:
 
How many cigars are in this tour pack and what kind... i hope it is about a box worth of cigars
 
jfields said:
I guess I'm just a little different. I was laughing my ass off when I read Brads' post. :laugh:
Click to expand...

Me too. And I can actually top his story for "most disgusting thing witnessed." Here we go...

My roommate and good friend of mine in college was in Officer Candidate School for the Marine Corps. Great guy, but a little bit "touched" in exactly the kind of way you want in a Marine (and I mean that fondly, Devil Dogs out there).

Back then a number of people we knew chewed tobacco, either dip or chew, or what have you... so there was a communal 2 pint glass Tropicana bottle that served as a "spitter". People would come in, spit their tobacco juice and saliva into it, and occasionally hock a lugie into it.

It'd accumulated about a week's worth of spittle & phlegm from various patrons, when the topic of the $80 my friend owed me came up. I told him if he drank the "spitter" I'd clear up his debt.

Never one to back down from a challenge, he accepted immediately. He prepped himself by chugging some Pepto Bismo, and then sniffed the "spitter". He wrinkled his nose as the various hues of tobacco juice and snot glistened like a perverse stained glass window in the light.

Bottoms up, he tilted it to his lips, and the foul concoction oozed towards his mouth, then broke free like a falling glacier, and splashed on his lips like diarrhea hitting a toilet bowl.

He chugged it down to the sludge in the bottom, then projectile vomited all over the bathroom sink. He was turning a little green, but I impassionately noted that the bet was he had to finish it all. So he slurped the fetid waste out of the bottom of the glistening Tropicana bottle, and then vomited again.

He turned green, curled up in a fetal position, and passed out for the night. For some reason, he didn't want to come drinking with us that night. :)
 
moki said:
Bottoms up, he tilted it to his lips, and the foul concoction oozed towards his mouth, then broke free like a falling glacier, and splashed on his lips like diarrhea hitting a toilet bowl.

He chugged it down to the sludge in the bottom, then projectile vomited all over the bathroom sink. He was turning a little green, but I impassionately noted that the bet was he had to finish it all. So he slurped the fetid waste out of the bottom of the glistening Tropicana bottle, and then vomited again.

He turned green, curled up in a fetal position, and passed out for the night. For some reason, he didn't want to come drinking with us that night. :)
Click to expand...

Just reading this made me wretch a bit. Er....Thanks?? for the colorful description.....but uh....don't do it again.

???




:laugh:
 
moki said:
jfields said:
I guess I'm just a little different. I was laughing my ass off when I read Brads' post. :laugh:
Click to expand...

Me too. And I can actually top his story for "most disgusting thing witnessed." Here we go...

My roommate and good friend of mine in college was in Officer Candidate School for the Marine Corps. Great guy, but a little bit "touched" in exactly the kind of way you want in a Marine (and I mean that fondly, Devil Dogs out there).

Back then a number of people we knew chewed tobacco, either dip or chew, or what have you... so there was a communal 2 pint glass Tropicana bottle that served as a "spitter". People would come in, spit their tobacco juice and saliva into it, and occasionally hock a lugie into it.

It'd accumulated about a week's worth of spittle & phlegm from various patrons, when the topic of the $80 my friend owed me came up. I told him if he drank the "spitter" I'd clear up his debt.

Never one to back down from a challenge, he accepted immediately. He prepped himself by chugging some Pepto Bismo, and then sniffed the "spitter". He wrinkled his nose as the various hues of tobacco juice and snot glistened like a perverse stained glass window in the light.

Bottoms up, he tilted it to his lips, and the foul concoction oozed towards his mouth, then broke free like a falling glacier, and splashed on his lips like diarrhea hitting a toilet bowl.

He chugged it down to the sludge in the bottom, then projectile vomited all over the bathroom sink. He was turning a little green, but I impassionately noted that the bet was he had to finish it all. So he slurped the fetid waste out of the bottom of the glistening Tropicana bottle, and then vomited again.

He turned green, curled up in a fetal position, and passed out for the night. For some reason, he didn't want to come drinking with us that night. :)
Click to expand...

Sounds like a fella I was in OCS with. When was he there? Come to think of it, that fella would have done the same thing to clear a debt of $10.00.
 
Well thanks to Andrew, there is now no need for me to post my story about the 4 month old bong water... :p
 
TFF! Yeah, you gotta add the "Everybody cleans up their own puke" to the Outlaw rules. Years ago I was a helicopter crewchief in the Army. We enforced that rule for everybody. No matter what the mission or who we picked up, It was a salute, "Good morning, sir", "Here you go, right in here"...I'd help them get buckled in and then lean over, pull their earpiece away from their head (we almost always picked up folks hot) and yell into their ear, "if you puke, you clean it up". They'd give me the nod and away we'd go. Funniest thing I ever saw was a Major yakking into his hat.

I've seen a couple of guys drink from soda cans that contained dip-spit. Always accidentally. Back in those days, lots of the guys I worked with dipped. They would leave their 1/2 full soda cans laying around and if you weren't careful, or in a hurry, you could easily grab one and take a big swig. Nothing funnier than a guy working in 100+ degree heat, coming into the air conditioning and grabbing what he thinks is his can of Coke and taking a big swig only to discover it's a half full can of 2 day-old, dip-spit. Of course, we had the "no spitting inside" rule so they had to hold it and run outside to spit. Ha, ha, ha...Still makes me laugh, 25 years later.

Ok, class, what have we learned?

Don't drink from a warm soda can.
 
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