Aalvord2
Well-Known Member
As a new father of twin boys (born December 4th, 2022) I already find great value in this thread, and want to thank you all for this!!!
Pugman1943
Well-Known Member
With twin boys, Aalvord2 needs to join Superman for a drink and a smoke. Bless you brother.
MaytagMan
Well-Known Member
My son is 12, and I know a dad joke is golden when I tell it and he just looks at me, rolls his eyes, and says "I hate you" 
cohibasurfer
one day older than dirt
Pugman1943
Well-Known Member
Thanks for not using my name in vain.
cohibasurfer
one day older than dirt
It takes to long to spell ... Ed.
CigarStone
For once, knowledge is making me poor!
It's Ed, not ED.
Pugman1943
Well-Known Member
Both Maytag man and myself agreed that we don't know our real names anymore.
MaytagMan
Well-Known Member
True indeed.
kann
One Leg Of Fury.
Q: What's the difference between a piano, a tuna, and a pot of glue?
A: You can tune a piano, but you can't piano a tuna.
A: You can tune a piano, but you can't piano a tuna.
Pugman1943
Well-Known Member
I double dare you to give this to your wife, or, any of our wives. Not if you like your dingle.
CigarStone
For once, knowledge is making me poor!
I don't understand why this is in the joke thread?
kann
One Leg Of Fury.
What has four letters, occasionally has twelve letters, always has six letters, but never has five letters.
CigarStone
For once, knowledge is making me poor!
What has six balls and fucks you?
The lottery
The lottery
CigarStone
For once, knowledge is making me poor!
A man and his wife took his wife's mother on a vacation to the holy land. On the second day the man's mother in law died.
The undertaker said "We can ship your mother in law home for $5000 of we can bury her here in the holy land for $150"
The man said he would ship her home, to which the undertaker said "why would you spend $5000 to ship her home when we can bury her in the holy land for $150?"
The man said "some 2000 years ago, a man died here and three days later he arose from the dead ....I just can't take that chance"
The undertaker said "We can ship your mother in law home for $5000 of we can bury her here in the holy land for $150"
The man said he would ship her home, to which the undertaker said "why would you spend $5000 to ship her home when we can bury her in the holy land for $150?"
The man said "some 2000 years ago, a man died here and three days later he arose from the dead ....I just can't take that chance"
Le Primauguet
Well-Known Member
Where do bad rainbows go?
Prism. It's a light sentence and gives them time to reflect.
Prism. It's a light sentence and gives them time to reflect.