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Passes of late

This topic was brought up and stickied five years ago. The biggest difference I see is that then it was discussed insightfully, and today it is being argued defensively.
 
Really guys, we're arguing over something that is a positive, and turning it into a negative.
I think that CP'ers are micro-analyzing things too much lately. Chill out, have a smoke, take a piss...whatever it takes to get you to reall think about what you're about to say.


I agree on what Rod and Rob are saying.

Now in the future, don't mention that name.

I am the shit as someone else pointed out and my wife calls me that way so it must be the truth.

Thanks for all the man love and my mangina feels great.

Matt, I am aware it wasn't about me, but it became about me. I said it before if I have it it will be given out to others it is just the way it is. I learned that from my parents. I also learned it from a few of the people that posted in this thread first hand, generosity is a life style, it replenishes our soul and makes the every day BS worthwhile.

So if I'm ever in your pass, know that if I take a $5 cigar, you'll get something more than just a $10 cigar you'll get my friendship and that has no price tag!

We now return to our regularly scheduled program
 
This topic was brought up and stickied five years ago. The biggest difference I see is that then it was discussed insightfully, and today it is being argued defensively.


Matt it isn't being argued defensively, it became about picking sides.
 
Thanks for all the man love and my mangina feels great.

Matt, I am aware it wasn't about me, but it became about me.
Ooohhh.. can I feel your mangina too? :love:

Bruce, we are discussing this. And I am fully aware that this was never about "He who must not be named". But in places it did seem to point in his direction. So I jumped in the picket line to show my support for my brother, not to be indignant and stop the discussion.

That being said ... The pass host is in charge of running his/her pass. The pass host has the final say in all P's and T's. With inexperienced pass hosts comes a myriad of issues; issues that they are never even aware could pop up when they first venture down that path. I was one of those, and T.B. called me out on it. I've learned a lot since then, and try to share my experience. But in the end, it is up to the pass host to keep things in check for his/her pass. And if we BOTL's see something that doesn't seem quite right, then it is up to us to open up communication about the issue with the pass host.

I hated it when my S.O. would say stuff like, "it seems like you don't want to spend time with me anymore" or something like that without giving me specific examples that I can reference. So it seemed like we were in alternate realities, and she couldn't site instances that could be discussed. So I have always told her to talk about the issue as it comes up, so I can deal with it at the time. Same goes here, call out issues as they come up so we can deal with them at the time. ... I'm not saying the topic is bad, but the way it was phrased comes off as accusatory, and a BOTL's name was mentioned right around the time of the accusation. So things got skewed....

Now, back to my scotch and cigar! :thumbs:
- C
 
This is a good topic to remind people that they should be doing things for the right reasons. No one would ever fault someone for being generous, when that's what it really is.

tony-ny said:
Thanks for all the man love and my mangina feels great.

Glad to see you got all the sand out. :D
 
This is a good topic to remind people that they should be doing things for the right reasons. No one would ever fault someone for being generous, when that's what it really is.

tony-ny said:
Thanks for all the man love and my mangina feels great.

Glad to see you got all the sand out. :D

:laugh: :laugh:
 
Thanks for all the man love and my mangina feels great.

Matt, I am aware it wasn't about me, but it became about me.
Ooohhh.. can I feel your mangina too? :love:

Bruce, we are discussing this. And I am fully aware that this was never about "He who must not be named". But in places it did seem to point in his direction. So I jumped in the picket line to show my support for my brother, not to be indignant and stop the discussion.

That being said ... The pass host is in charge of running his/her pass. The pass host has the final say in all P's and T's. With inexperienced pass hosts comes a myriad of issues; issues that they are never even aware could pop up when they first venture down that path. I was one of those, and T.B. called me out on it. I've learned a lot since then, and try to share my experience. But in the end, it is up to the pass host to keep things in check for his/her pass. And if we BOTL's see something that doesn't seem quite right, then it is up to us to open up communication about the issue with the pass host.

I hated it when my S.O. would say stuff like, "it seems like you don't want to spend time with me anymore" or something like that without giving me specific examples that I can reference. So it seemed like we were in alternate realities, and she couldn't site instances that could be discussed. So I have always told her to talk about the issue as it comes up, so I can deal with it at the time. Same goes here, call out issues as they come up so we can deal with them at the time. ... I'm not saying the topic is bad, but the way it was phrased comes off as accusatory, and a BOTL's name was mentioned right around the time of the accusation. So things got skewed....

Now, back to my scotch and cigar! :thumbs:
- C

Here, and I though you were just being a dumbass. :sign:

Tony, you don't have near enough cigars to just go tossin em into passes. And, the manginia thing busted just about every warm fuzzy I ever had about you. Geeze!

Now that Holmes has weighed in, I'm good.
 
Thanks for all the man love and my mangina feels great.

Matt, I am aware it wasn't about me, but it became about me.
Ooohhh.. can I feel your mangina too? :love:

Bruce, we are discussing this. And I am fully aware that this was never about "He who must not be named". But in places it did seem to point in his direction. So I jumped in the picket line to show my support for my brother, not to be indignant and stop the discussion.

That being said ... The pass host is in charge of running his/her pass. The pass host has the final say in all P's and T's. With inexperienced pass hosts comes a myriad of issues; issues that they are never even aware could pop up when they first venture down that path. I was one of those, and T.B. called me out on it. I've learned a lot since then, and try to share my experience. But in the end, it is up to the pass host to keep things in check for his/her pass. And if we BOTL's see something that doesn't seem quite right, then it is up to us to open up communication about the issue with the pass host.

I hated it when my S.O. would say stuff like, "it seems like you don't want to spend time with me anymore" or something like that without giving me specific examples that I can reference. So it seemed like we were in alternate realities, and she couldn't site instances that could be discussed. So I have always told her to talk about the issue as it comes up, so I can deal with it at the time. Same goes here, call out issues as they come up so we can deal with them at the time. ... I'm not saying the topic is bad, but the way it was phrased comes off as accusatory, and a BOTL's name was mentioned right around the time of the accusation. So things got skewed....

Now, back to my scotch and cigar! :thumbs:
- C



Here, and I though you were just being a dumbass. :sign:

Tony, you don't have near enough cigars to just go tossin em into passes. And, the manginia thing busted just about every warm fuzzy I ever had about you. Geeze!

Now that Holmes has weighed in, I'm good.

Maybe I'll send you an 8 X10 glossy of the manginia for your mantle!
 
Really guys, we're arguing over something that is a positive, and turning it into a negative.
I think that CP'ers are micro-analyzing things too much lately...
I disagree.

That this has sparked some fairly serious exchanges, both insightful and heated, should be a clue that this situation is not as simple as something purely positive. The issue under discussion is complex because:
a. involves the exercise of core values held by the community - this gets at the heart of CigarPass
b. involves members with a wide range of experience in life, at CigarPass, and in passes - as this forum grows, there will be ever more new members that will benefit from some explicit teaching

To gloss over this or joke it away is ultimately more detrimental to the community than it might seem. If progress isn't made on the issue, it will come back again and in no better state.

But I'll spare you guys the dissertation. I think the key points have already been made:
1. General pass rules apply to all passes unless amended by the pass-master.
- The rules delineate the minimum standard for proper behavior. If proper behavior in the context of a "brass balls" level pass is "do as you will" then that becomes the law in force. If you've read the pass rules and can't abide by them, then you're not obligated to play.​
2. Play at your level or a little above.
- You've gotta stretch to keep growing, but step off the deep end too soon and you will end up feeling disappointed, inadequate, or frustrated. Don't accept the invitation if you think you can't hang. You might not be able to today, but maybe someday you will, if you want to. And even if you don't, no one's going to think any less of you.​
3. Know your fellow passers.
- If you're invited to play among a group of senior members AND the cigar list looks intimidating, then maybe this pass isn't for you. Also, part of being a good and conscientious passer is knowing your fellow passers, their quirks, their likes and dislikes, and their passing habits. You can't pick this up overnight but you can learn this by participating on the forum or following along with a pass as a silent spectator.​
4. What is it that makes someone a good pass player?
- They are aware of the nature of the pass they participate in and play an appropriate role. For example, in an unlimited pass, I'll do whatever delights me and the other passers as long as it is okay with a) the pass master and b) the other participants. However, in a newbie style pass, I'll do my best to post P/Ts within $0.25, explain good and poor pairings, advise on value judgments, and describe in gory detail where and how I arrived at the exchange values.​
And finally, Anthony is one of my dearest colleagues on this forum. If the day ever comes where he says "I'm walking" then I'd know that was the day CigarPass had lost its heart. My response would be "I'll follow you out." Today is not that day for him or for me. For as long as I have known him here (pretty much day one for me), his intentions and actions have always been just, collegial, good. But this doesn't come free of cost. Anthony thinks about the goings on and the people here at the Pass. He worries about the people and the community. Many are the times I've gone to him for advice and counsel. And out of the goodness of his heart, he's always taken the time out of his busy day at the office to comfort me. See for yourself!

Anthony at the office. He's the one in the suit.

Anthony making time to speak with his good buddy, Wilkey.

But why does he always sound just a little distracted?

Wilkey
 
So, which one are you in the picture Wilkey? The one holding the drink? ???
 
And out of the goodness of his heart, he's always taken the time out of his busy day at the office to comfort me. See for yourself!

I don't know what's worse... that you have links to pictures like that readily available or that I clicked on all three hoping they'd get better... they didn't. :sign:
 
F wit Tony, F wit me an you don't want that. You bring the sticks and I'll bring the hootch Anthony
 
There is no phone and no computer on that desk......there can't be much work getting done ???
 
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